King of Primates

Going Black

2009-09-07T20:05:00.000-07:00

So, within the next couple of hours, Dim Bulb Comics will be blinking off. I'm switching domain name registrars and because of it, dimbulbcomics.com will be MIA for about 42 days. This sucks, but it's a necessary evil.

Besides, it's not like there are any comics coming through here these days.

The Titan's Curse

2008-12-10T19:57:00.001-08:00

Third book. Also awesome. This was difficult to do, though, because I was so far removed from the book by the time I drew it. Still haven't started on the drawing from the fourth...That's gonna be a bear, too...

No, not a bear drawing...

Sea of Monsters

2008-12-04T18:48:00.000-08:00

This would be from the second Percy Jackson book. Also quite awesome.

Channeling Ramos

2008-12-03T19:20:00.000-08:00

So, like I mentioned before, I've been reading lately...you know, because I just remembered how. And, if you remember, or if you scan down a bit, I started reading the Percy Jackson and the Olympians series, which is awesome pulped, pressed and bound in either paper or hardback form. If you have any interest at all in awesome, and Greek mythology, I highly recommend it.

Anyway, I've been a bit obsessed with the series, having read books 2 & 3 Monday and Tuesday this week. Today, I was having fits because I couldn't find an available copy of book 4 anywhere in the school. I checked the same bookcases, like, 6 times hoping, praying that it would be there. Still, I know that a kid on my boys' homeroom's team (long explanation if you don't know what I mean) has the book and he was within 40 pages of finishing, so hopefully, I'll catch it at the library after he returns it.

All that to say, I've also been inspired to draw interpretations of scenes from each one. This is the first one, from the first book. If you can't read the scrawl at the bottom, it says "Percy Jackson in the Underworld." The next one, in which Percy faces down the cyclops Polyphemus, is much better, I think. Still, I like the hint of Ramos in Percy.

Humberto Ramos, I mean. I love his stuff.

Literati

2008-11-28T15:10:00.000-08:00

On the advice of someone who knows, I've picked up my reading lately. I finally finished a book by Raymond E. Feist that I started back in August...I'd blamed the time it took on being busy, but it turns out that it may've been lack of interest. Now, Feist is probably my favorite author, so it was hard for me to admit that I didn't like his book, but, there it is. I came to this realization with the next book that I read, the choice being influenced by my desire to teach and the age range that I'd like to and such. The book was The Lightning Theif by Rick Riordan, the first in the series Percy Jackson and the Olympians.

Awesome.

Lots of action, lots of references to Greek mythology, and the story itself wasn't too bad either. I finished it in my customary two days...and that was while I was working. ...I don't mean I read it while I was working...this week was only two days long because of Thanksgiving and I read it in those two. Anyway... In a lot of ways, it reminded me of American Gods and Anansi Boys. You know...except that it was geared for kids in middle school and junior high. All in all, it was pretty good stuff.

Then, the next day, I read Rules. I forget who the author is (yes, the book is like 15 ft. away, but I'm lazy...you can Google it), but it's about a girl who's brother is autistic and some stuff that happens to her over a summer.

I was bored.

It's not that it's a bad book. It's just that it's a girl book. It's all about relationships and stuff and in its 200 pages it just went. There were some genuinely funny parts, but the fact is that it was a horrible choice for a follow-up to something as high energy as The Lightning Thief. I didn't choose it so much as it was chosen for me, though. So, in short, I'll probably read the next three of the Percy Jackson books and avoid anything else by the author of Rules.

Lord of the Video

2008-10-10T19:21:00.000-07:00

MONKEY UPDATE!

ITEM! THE MARKET FALLS AS THE ACID RISES!
I've been off Prilosec for a week now, give or take a bit. I feel like someone's been dancing on the tip of my sternum. It is unpleasant. I'll be going back on it soon, but I ran out and need to get to Wal-Mart. Yay. One of the many things we'll be picking up when we finally breakdown and go. I hate giving them money. So very much.

ITEM! COMICS KEEP ROLLING!
Every day has been a new test for continuing the comic I've got going on above. I draw one every weekday, which means that even though it posts thrice a week, I'm actually drawing two extra. If I count right, that means that I've got enough to finish the month. Of course, that's just a guess. I'd have to "look" to know for sure. The thing is, every day, as I sit down to draw the comic, I wonder, "What the heck can I actually do more?" I can already tell that some are not as successful as others, but I'm enjoying testing the boundaries of a comic that has such odd rules for storytelling. I do not use words for dialogue. I do not use people. I use background sparingly. But, anything else goes. So long as it can happen to a blob creature.

ITEM! MYTHIC PROPORTIONS AND SUCH!
I finished writing a myth today. It was a short, simple one, but it's kind of the basis for the world in the idea that was once the comic I was thinking about doing some time back. Woohoo for useless progress!

ITEM! HEROES STILL ROCKS!
It does. Really.

Rabbit Out of Season

2008-09-26T10:52:00.000-07:00

It turns out that I have a lot of left over Easter candy. That's a big deal with Halloween quickly approaching. I mean, we've got to make room, right? And it isn't like I'm going Trick-or-Treating with Aaron (there's the church thing, but it doesn't count), but there will be all the candy that we get for trick-or-treaters that don't come. Because they never come. Apparently, my house is creepier than I realized. Yon Cricket could confirm that it messy and stupid but not terribly creepy.

Well, if he weren't MIA. If you were paying attention, he did manage to phone in a comic...quite literally, actually...but I couldn't say if or when his Libyan captors will allow him the supplies to do another.

Libyans...they were the terrorists that Doc Brown made a "nuclear" device for using pinball parts.

Movies...I did a segment of the "lesson time" for the youth dept. at my church on Wednesday night. Got the chance to prove my useless knowledge as part of an illustration. I followed a circuitous path from Darth Maul back to himself in 16 steps. I didn't expect the "awws" when I went past Heath Ledger, though I suppose I should've. Anyway, even if I didn't get my point across (I hope I did, but who knows), I did manage to prove that my brain is a collecting pool of absolutely useless movie-related facts.

Go me!

Swing and a Miss

2008-09-13T10:00:00.000-07:00

So, I got all my stuff lined up and I'm still not a teacher. Which kinda blows. BUT, that said, I am working in a school and I DO like what I do. It ain't what I was aiming for, but it's alright.

Still, I really want to teach art next year.

Anyway, you may have noticed a new comic up there. What is it called? I dunno. What are those things? Gelatinous blobs and a big hungry thing. Is this a new, on-going comic? Beats me!

I can answer all your questions, I just can't guarantee satisfactory answers!

That said, it feels good posting comics (I've got two more in the can...as of Saturday the 13th..and one more ready to scan and panel. Not bad, I think. So, GO! Tell your friends! Dim Bulb is back and...something...and at least I'm really excited about it.

Pass the Turkey

2008-04-21T17:03:00.000-07:00

Well, I passed my Praxis II tests. All three of them. Miracle of miracles, I say. Taking three tests in a day was a train wreck waiting to happen, but somehow I managed to keep everything on track. That means that I'm one step closer to actually doing something productive.

Woohoo.

No, really. I am excited. I'm just a little fried about the whole thing. The stress is crazy and...oh crap. I should've called...whoever it is that I was supposed to call. Actually, she was supposed to call me (that's what they said on Friday when I left a message) but I didn't call back to make sure. Great. One more thing.

Anyway, the tests are out of the way and that's spectacular. My mom's trying to get me to take another set of tests for some other area, but I really think that'd be a waste of money. I mean, I did well in some of my other courses, but I only really studied Art.

At least for now, though, I can rest with the bit of assurance that I'm at least good for teaching art. Now to 1) get into the program and 2) get a job.

No big deal.

Slight Improvements

2008-02-25T18:12:00.000-08:00

Got my Praxis scores back. My Writing (the one I didn't know) was 3 points off perfect.

So, I'm good.

So Much For Plan B

2008-02-25T12:06:00.000-08:00

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/' hg hghghg gujhg ujjjjjj n n n n

No, I'm not having a brain spasm. Aaron woke up just as I logged in and started to type, so he got to take a crack at blogging. Perhaps we'll work on English a bit more before we take on Keyboarding.

I feel like a major failure. I'm still waiting on my Praxis I scores (well, score...I do still have the other two), so that's not it. You see, the other part of The Plan was to do a lot of substituting between now and when the NTLP starts up and I won't be able to work at all (of course, that's most likely in July which means there would've been a bit of a time lapse between when school ends, but if all went as planned that wouldn't have mattered) which would keep everything going until that good teacher money starts rolling in (which is only said somewhat ironically as my library checks were abysmally small...I couldn't pee on the poverty line without getting my feet wet). The disappointment comes in when you take into account that I've been out of the library all this month and I've subbed a whopping three, count 'em, three times. I've got two more actually lined up later this week, for a total of five (for the mathematically impaired), which is just enough to say that this is bloody stupid.

Now, I realize, intellectually, that I have no control over how often I get called in. I mean, I'm new, so they're surely going to call in the old standbys first, but I've signed up in four separate school districts at ALL levels and February is supposedly the sickest month of the year. Even still, I feel like somehow this is my fault and I'm officially bummed.

Upside is that I get more family time. Downside is that family time doesn't put food on the table.

Praxis Makes Perfect

2008-02-07T11:49:00.000-08:00

I took my Praxis I test today. Well, yesterday, really. I mean it's 45 minutes past Wednesday, now, but I haven't slept yet, so I'm a little fuzzy on how to count my relative day. Not that it matters how I count it. (So, instead I'll go to sleep and write the rest later) I feel good about the test, in general. I don't like that I know the results for 2 out of the 3 test sections and not the third. I think I could deal better if I knew nothing. Instead, I've got the majority of the picture, but not the full thing.

Whining aside, I did well on the two sections I've seen the results from. I did well above the requirement in reading and math. The first was expected (not only do I generally test well, but reading comprehension has always been a favorite test subject of mine) but the second was a surprise. More so, when you consider that I actually scored higher on the math section than the reading section. It was a point difference, but still...I hate math! How does this happen? Was I just warming up through the reading section or did my brain decide to screw with me in the middle of the single most important test I've taken in the last half decade? I suppose there's also the possibility that the math section was just ridiculously easy. Whatever the reason, I'm just glad that if there's any section I have left, it's the writing section. That doesn't mean that I'm not worried about it, but I wasn't worried about it going in, which is important. I worried about the math section for the last couple weeks. Let it be writing now. Actually, I feel good about my essay, not a bad bit of writing for the time I was given, but the editing section has me worried. I can edit well enough just reading someone else's writing, but the multiple choice thing was kind of overwhelming.

With that out of the way (hopefully), I just need to get the Praxis II done (another writing section, a multiple choice knowledge section that has me peeing my pants, and a section that requires me to take four pictures of my work to submit for criticism...which suddenly makes me regret my focus on cartooning) and somehow manage to get accepted into the Non-Traditional Licensure Program (henceforth referred to as the NTLP).

After that, I'll part the Red Sea, walk on water and achieve cold fusion in my bathtub.

The Ship Being Jumped: A Work in Progress

2008-01-31T09:25:00.000-08:00

Today is my last day in the library.

That's one of those sentences that proves, rather conclusively, that I'll never be a professional writer. I mean, in conveying a rather profound and life-changing event, I managed to suck all the drama out of it and leave you with the emotional equivalent of a Denny's waitress delivering hash browns. The fact is, that this is a bit scary. I'm leaping into the unknown blindly. But, if there's a time to go, this is certainly it.

Since Chuck is my hero, I've decided to follow him into teaching.

Ok, maybe Chuck had nothing to do with it, but he is a heck of a nice guy. And taller than I remember. Strange. Anyway, it's been one of those things that I've wanted to do for some time, in a private-to-myself-and-lovely-wife sense, but something that was out of reach by circumstances. The thing is, now, I can get and the getting is good. I plan to get my feet wet doing some substitute teaching and, simultaneously, looking for a throw-away job to keep the cash coming until the alternative licensure program kicks up in the summer. Then, God willing, I'll score a sweet job teaching art at some school within driving distance of my residence.

Short driving distance. I don't want to spend the whole day in the car, thanks.

At present, though, I don't know who will have jobs open in the area. That's scary. That either means that a job needs to be created, someone needs to move, or someone needs to take a stroll through the pearly gates.

Side note: please don't kill anyone just so I can get a job. I know how it might seem like you're doing me a favor, but I've seen enough Law & Order to know you wouldn't be. Thanks.

Back in...

2008-01-29T09:04:00.000-08:00

I am wearing a black shirt today.

This, in and of itself, is hardly noteworthy. I wear this shirt about as often as I wear any of my other shirts to work. What made me think about it is that Ted Danson, on Becker as Becker (reruns, of course...they play while I'm running out the door), mentioned to a woman that black was very slimming.

I've heard this before, but I never really thought about the context. I mean, let's say I go up to someone and say, "Hey, nice shirt. Black is very slimming." What I've really just said is, "Hey, you're fat. That shirt makes you look slightly less so."

And then, I get slapped.

I suppose I get the principle behind the idea. I mean, black shadows less on itself and so it creates more of a silhouette of you and leaves out some of the 3-dimensionality (but, let's face it...even black has its limits) making one look like they might, in fact, be a bit more slim. I, for one, don't think it works in profile, though. At least, it doesn't on me.

When I was working at Wal-Mart, one of my coworkers and I had a running joke (?) that we were actually in a paper and pencil RPG. I'm sure we weren't the first to say such things, but we both decided that we'd fumbled a roll getting a job there. To carry that idea on, I wonder if black clothing items would then give you a negative bonus to your girth attribute, which would, inversely, affect your charisma. I imagine that a shirt made from carbon nanotubes would be some sort of quest item, giving a -5/+5 to girth and charisma respectively. Of course, there would probably be some sort of off-set to that, since black draws in light and heat like Britney Spears does crazy. Maybe over time the charisma bonus would start ticking away because the user gets sweaty.

Of course, no amount of black clothing created charisma could erase the stink of having played a Britney Spears song in a band, regardless of intended irony.

Fortunately, no one here has ever done that.

No Fuss? Make One!

2008-01-16T07:09:00.000-08:00

I'm all for sensitivity. Really. Well, due sensitivity, anyway. I mean, you just don't go up and ask someone if they want to go back over puppies with you just after their dog has been run over. You don't ask a widow how single life is at her husband's funeral. And you certainly don't surprise a soldier fresh from Iraq with some leftover Black Cats from July 4th. Why? Because it's insensitive. And unduly so. Eventually, though, the dog owner will get over the loss of a pet, either through time or replacement, the widow will hopefully accept the loss (though respect for the dead is still a good plan) and, God willing, the soldier will not suffer long term trauma due to his service.

That said...you had to see that coming...I think Fox News needs to man up. While doing my daily Google news check on the WGA strike (I needs mah TV, mayn!), I came across an article about JJ Abrams new movie Cloverfield. Thanks to clever marketing, I was intrigued by the movie around the time the first trailers ran. I probably won't ever see the movie because Andria thinks it looks stupid and our movie watching time is limited anyway, so I try to subject her to as little crap as possible. I don't feel like this has lessened my enjoyment of anything, though. I'll just read the plot summary on Wikipedia and call it a day. What got me was how the article said, and I quote:

Cloverfield also inadvertently disses New York for what happened on Sept. 11, 2001, by re-enacting scenes of buildings exploding and massive clouds of debris for fun and profit.

Does no one recall what was said following the World Trade Center disasters? There was such sensitivity about the huge human losses that images of the Twin Towers were erased from movie posters and excised from films.

Like I said, I'm all for sensitivity, but is it really necessary that we call a moratorium on destroying New York because of what happened? I mean, if we follow that logic, shouldn't Peter Berg and the people at Universal be called insensitive for protraying an attack on Americans on foreign soil. I mean, the US embassy attack in Kenya happened in '98, only three year before the September 11th attacks. And I am Legend has WAY more dead New Yorkers than Cloverfield, if that's the bar for sensitivity that we're setting. I mean, ALL of them are dead except Will Smith. And The Bourne Ultimatum has Matt Damon, which is insensitive to Ben Affleck, because Matt still has an acting career.

Now, hyperbole aside, it's not like Abrams and Co. are pulling a Uwe Boll and making light of the attack. They just have a movie that a) is set in New York and b) due to the plot has scenes of New York's destruction. They could have set it elsewhere and nobody would've thought a thing about any relationship between the attack and the movie. The clouds of debris would be just that. Clouds of debris. If they'd been left out, someone, maybe even the writer of the same article, would've cried foul over the lack of realism in the mayhem. But, they didn't. NYC got the spotlight. Why? Because the city itself is an icon. No other city is as recognizable as "America". Not only is it culturally significant, though, but it's also geographically prime. The 1998 Godzilla movie also took place in New York and also featured he destruction of the city. Now, I don't expect that anyone should've been offended preemptively, but the reason New York was chosen as a replacement for Tokyo (once again, beyond the cultural significance) is that New York is on the coast. Unless something is coming from space and lands in a cornfield, it has to go through some coastal area. And if it's going through a coastal area, why not someplace where it can trash things? I'm not a monster, I don't know how they think (ok, how they WOULD think, since they're not real), but I assume that a monster worth its salt would probably bypass someplace like Holly Ridge, North Carolina, in favor of the Big Apple. What would it do, kick over the Faith Harbor United Methodist Church, trip over Danny's Welding and Crane Service, then head back out to sea, bored to death? Please!

I'm not presuming that Cloverfield will be a good movie. It's a giant monster flick made by a guy who couldn't keep people interested in a bunch of castaways long enough to match Gilligan's Island!
(Ok, Gilligan only made it three seasons and Lost will be starting number four soon, but Gilligan died so that Gunsmoke could live and Lost is really only on life support because JJ and crew promised to wrap up that mess in 2010)

What I am saying is that the victims and families of the September 11th attacks should be treated with respect. However, that doesn't mean that we should automatically shy away from telling a story just because a minority of people who MIGHT go into the movie completely unaware of its subject matter and be offended by it. If Hollywood would like to do something to keep a majority of people from being offended, instead, they should try to stop making crap.

Christmas Came and Went

2007-12-26T15:58:00.000-08:00

This Christmas was pretty awesome. Having my Grandma Rosie here has been nice. I get the feeling she's a little uncomfortable with Aaron. Not because she's unsure about babies or even how she feels about him. It's just the fact that he's a year old, rather energetic, and really comfortable with everyone around except her because she's the new one. Maybe if she came over here alone... I should've thought of that before. Since my brother's family gets here tomorrow, I think the "over at my house" portion of the break is over...

Crap.

Well, the "haul" is rather spectacular. I should've had a more impressive list. Asked for the world and all. When you get what you ask for, you obviously aren't shooting high enough.

Oh well.

Cricket and his esposa dropped by. It was really cool to see them both. They stayed a while, had some food, coversated, all that. I even inadvertently called Michelle emotionally abusive. Sweet. I don't know quite how that happened. I started saying something about attaching a face to the name, but at the sentence's off-ramp, I missed my turn and went three exits too far before crossing the median and merging into an 18-wheeler. I think that maybe she was aware that I was having a verbal meltdown because she didn't SEEM offended. I was, though. I was pretty offended at me.

Spectacular Spectacular

2007-12-18T20:05:00.000-08:00

My mother bought the Josh Groban Christmas CD recently. I've heard a song or two of his before, but it wasn't until hearing his rendition of Little Drummer Boy that I realized this:

Josh Groban could sing the Taco Bell Value Menu and make it sound like a romantic epic.

That's all.

Cataloging

2007-12-16T21:48:00.000-08:00

My musical quest continues. At my current position, I've gone through the vast majority of my own collection and have put a sizeable dent in my wife's when it comes to loading them onto the iPod. The current length, if playing every song until they were all played once, hovers at just under 40 days of music. Theoretically, I could ride out The Flood. Well, the flooding part. Not so much the floodED part. I might have to hear a song more than once, may God have mercy upon me. I was a bit worried, though, because a lot of stuff that I consider to be essential, along with some stuff that isn't, was MIA until late last night. As it stood, I was going to be without Soundgarden (not to be confused with Savage Garden...gah...my wife scares me sometimes...*shiver*...) and the MTV Unplugged disc was my only Nirvana. I still had AiC to up the Seattle count, but From the Muddy Banks... was unaccounted for and there's a lot of good Cobain stuff on there. Live tracks, no less. I'm considering the amount of work involved in creating a Live Tracks playlist, among others, and it would be hurting without some Heartshaped Box. Beyond that, I was also missing Jars of Clay's Much Afraid and a couple Beatles CDs. There may have been a logic to placing all those in the same case, the one that was hidden until last night, but it escapes me now.

They'll have to wait until I finish my wife's collection, which should take only an hour or two more. That's helped by the fact that, even though I'm endeavoring to load most everything on, there are certain things I will not abide. Savage Garden being one. I don't remember seeing any in her stacks, but if it is, it's getting bypassed.

My wife doesn't see the point in all the effort I'm going to get it ALL loaded on, but I think she'll appreciate it the next time we have to iPod it across the country to Idaho. I mean, not having to lug a CD case of the things we thought we might want to listen to, having it jammed in the front seat, taking up precious real estate, these all appeal to me greatly. Even if I have to have The Dixie Chicks on there.

Yeah, I managed to let them pass my crap filter. I don't feel good about it, but I did.

I've been lying to her, though, about how I just need to finish loading them, because unless we want to listen to them shuffled randomly or sorted by artist, album or whatever, there's no appreciable way to hear what I want to hear in groups. I mean, REALLY the way I want to hear it. Smartlists are fine, but somehow my Sinatra CD got into the 90's list I have going. That was a strange one.

It occurs to me that the Seinfeld CD is probably in there, too.

The problem with playlists, like mixtapes, is that they're just snapshots. Now, I'm not going to wax poetic on the subject, Cusack did that well enough, but finding a way to meaningfully divide music in a way that will remain relevant in the coming days, weeks, months, whatever...you know, when I'll actually be listening to it...seems daunting. I mean, it's not permanent like a tatoo (I had a hard time with that one...), but the active time committment of wading through thousands of songs to piece together a list (versus the passive time committment of loading them in the first place) is serious business. On the upside, I won't be dominating the DSL by that point (I should've put a wireless router on my Christmas list...).

By the by, if anyone knows of a way I can import cover art for the CDs iTunes couldn't find art for, I'd love to hear about it.

I suppose that, really, the playlisting is something I should consider a work in progress. I mean, I really don't need to become obsessed with that after I finish this.

Who would've known that taking my music into the 21st century would be so much work?

Capacitor

2007-12-12T17:15:00.000-08:00

I recently acquired an iPod in a game of chance. Rest easy. I didn't kill anyone you know for it. The iPod, as a status symbol, never much appealed to me. I mean, I remember when the Walkman was the cool thing and the iPod was just a new iteration of that idea. I mean, I'd had an mp3 player and gotten maybe 10 or 12 hours of use out of it before deciding it was too much trouble.

You'll have to forgive my ignorance.

The strength of the iPod lies in the fact that it doesn't just hold the music you put on it from A playlist and, possibly, shuffle them in different, random, yet oddly repetetive orders. Instead, it holds all the lists you can devise. I wish someone would've been kind enough to inform me of this. Also, the click wheel interface didn't much make sense to me at a glance. So you can skip forwards and backwards. So you can play and pause. So what? I didn't realize you could actually wheel about! Why is it that no one lets me know when I'm thinking something stupid?

...Wait, they do.

Why is it that people don't let me know when it's something I care about?!?! It's reintroduced music into my way of life.

Now, the one I own is a 5th generation 30gb, making it tiny by current standards. That's fine with me. First of all, it was free. Second of all, it's better than the iPod I had before. You know, none. Plus, as I am blissfully ignorant and don't know if it's a bitrate matter or one of file format and compression, I'm finding that at this point, after uploading at least half, if not 2/3 of my CD collection, I'm just barely cracking 2.5gb. And I've loaded EVERYTHING.

Well, not EVERYTHING. I did leave a couple tracks out from a CD or two that I copied because the tracks were bad. They never played right. I assume that my CD burner was faulty. I also skipped a couple compilation CDs that came in some magazines because I wasn't ready to weed out the feces from the good stuff at the time. I may just go back and load the whole thing later. Who knows. And I also skipped a couple entire discs that I bought cheap because they were CDs that my brother owned when we were both at home still. Had I taken into account that his tastes are wildly different from mine, I might've saved my $1.50.

I may load those on, as well. You never know when I might want to listen to crap.

On a whole, though it's been a pleasant experience, the main lesson I'm carrying away is that I don't own enough music. It's like a challenge to fill it up, and at this point, I don't think I can without cheating and loading tons of videos or something on it. I mean, my wife says I'm displaying obsessive behavior, which is kind of true, but loading CD after CD onto iTunes takes a while. After I get it all loaded onto that, one sync and I'm effectively finished (except for when I get new CDs...at Christmas and birthdays...) and the only other things I'll need to do with it (besides listening) are when I get an idea for a new playlist or something.

The lack of fillage (not a word) is rather annoying, though. I mean, according to the iTunes library, I've got 35+ days, DAYS, of music loaded currently and that's only 8.3% of it's total capacity. It suddenly makes sense that so many people are illegally downloading music. I mean, who has the time, let alone the funds, to continually shop for new music to fill these things? I think Steve Jobs is in cahoots (I despise that word) with the RIAA and probably the courts. He throws down the gauntlet by continually upping the capacity on his players. The User has to find methods to fill the player. The RIAA takes them to court for the illegal methods they use. The RIAA, the lawyers, and the courts collect their respective fees and winnings, and Jobs probably gets kickbacks or something. I don't know.

Now, lest ye think that I'm making some lame, old guy grab at the last vestiges of cool available to him, I should mention that of the non-music files on the iPod, which I named iPodicus Maximus...ironically, I think, I have pictures and videos of Aaron.

Sweet, but not cool. Because I was never that to begin with.

Kicking Skepticism in the Head

2007-12-11T17:05:00.000-08:00

When I heard they were making a new Indiana Jones movie...back when they first started talking about it...I was excited. I mean, after Star Wars, the original Indy movies were the greatest film trilogy of all time, followed by the Back to the Future movies.

Being a child of the 80's (I don't remember the 70's...being an infant and all), I suppose that I'm not entirely objective when it comes to the subject, but still, they just haven't made movies like that since then. I mean, even the Die Hard movies, which were all loads of fun, didn't even measure up, and the first was made in '88 (the year before Last Crusade, which was, in turn, out the year before Die Hard 2).

Anyway, as time went on, I became a bit skeptical. I mean, Harrison Ford will always be one of the coolest actors ever, but he's 65 years old, for crying out loud! He's been eligible for AARP membership for more than half my life! And in the original movies, he fought Nazis. They were going to have to age the character past when Nazis existed as a threat. How could that possibly work?!?!? To be honest, I was almost angry that they were still considering it. And what's this crap about Shia LaBeouf as the sidekick? He's no Sean Connery or John Rhys-Davies. He's not even that kid that played Short Round!

I suppose I should qualify what I just said about Shia LaBeouf. I'm pretty sure I've enjoyed everything I've seen him in...I just haven't gotten to where I respect him on his own merit. Ke Huy Quan was in Temple of Doom AND The Goonies!

And nothing much else...perhaps I should be rethinking my respect levels on both of them...

Anyway...then, I saw the poster.

I don't know that I've mentioned it before, but I love Drew Struzan's work. Something about seeing a Struzan poster makes me want to see a movie. If Titanic had Struzan posters, I'd have one up on my wall. Or, I would've when I was single. Screw masculinity! That man can paint! And speed! He can paint a poster in the time it took me to do a comic!

Well, that's probably not entirely true. I mean, I draw slow, but I'm counting from when I'd start to when I'd finish, interruptions and all. He did the poster for Carpenter's The Thing in a night, but I imagine he worked straight through. Even still, his posters are a fair sight prettier than my comics ever pretended to be.

So, evidence notwithstanding, I'm once again excited about Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull...all because the poster rocks.

Powerless

2007-12-04T17:42:00.000-08:00

synchronicity

Main Entry:
syn·chro·nic·i·ty
Pronunciation:
\ˌsiŋ-krə-ˈni-sə-tē, ˌsin-\
Function:
noun
Inflected Form(s):
plural syn·chro·nic·i·ties
Date:
circa 1889

1 : the quality or fact of being synchronous 2 : the coincidental occurrence of events and especially psychic events (as similar thoughts in widely separated persons or a mental image of an unexpected event before it happens) that seem related but are not explained by conventional mechanisms of causality —used especially in the psychology of C. G. Jung

It's funny. Well, really it's irritating to the point that I just want to punch someone, but that would be funny. Not for me, because I'd probably get beaten up, but funny for someone.

Anyway, having chased that rabbit, let's get back to the blog at hand.

So, the Heroes Volume 2 finale, titles "Powerless" was on last night. I know this in an academic sense. There is evidence it happened. I can cite sources and, were I inclined, give a close approximation of the plot. I cannot, however, give a first-hand account. Last night was the second night I stayed at my parents' because the power company was supposed to switch off the power to my house and connect some new stuff so that the old crappy stuff can go away.
I say "supposed to" because they didn't. Actually, today, the chances of it happening were, in their minds, slim. That was just information I didn't have. What they did today was send a woman with a spyglass-like measuring tool and a stake to mark where a new pole will go.

In two weeks.

Or whenever they get to it.

Beyond that, there's still no word on exactly how soon the new wire will be coming in along with all the switching off and on of power. April, I'm thinking. And what really bothers me is that there's nothing I can do but yell at people who 1) have no control over the situation and 2) aren't responsible for the mess, anyway.

Well, that, and I can watch Heroes....finally...

Reserved

2007-11-28T17:07:00.000-08:00

It never fails to amaze me how many reserve materials I receive in the last two weeks of a semester at work.

I should clarify.

As you may remember, I work at a university library. The work is mostly paper-based and I shuffle a lot of books between our library and others. The reserves, you may be shocked to learn, are materials professors either grab from the shelves or bring in and have me log specially as they are RESERVED for the use of their particular classes. Usually, only within the library walls, so that they may be available for all the class members and not just the first clown that waltzes in and checks them all out.

That brings to mind the first assignment I had in my Art History I class years ago. This guy came in and checked out all the books relevant to our first paper before anyone else could. I, of course, found this out after the fact because I didn't do the first paper. It had slipped my notice. Anyway, that was particularly amusing later in the semester when he dropped the class with a failing grade. Apparently he didn't use the books.

Back on topic, items which are used on reserve are almost universally listed in the syllabi of the professors, which are handed out at the beginning of the semester after being submitted to the department heads before classes begin. That is to say, professors know before classes start what materials they will be using throughout the semester. At least on paper. And yet, every semester, through the last week of classes, professors bring in things that their students will be responsible for.

Don't get me wrong, I don't begrudge them the procrastination. I'm ALL about procrastination. "Why do now what you can get a deadline extension on?" I always say. But, these are the same guys that feed you unbelievable amounts of crap for turning in your assignments the way they're turning in their materials for you to read. What's good for the goose is good for the...guy eating the goose...I don't know. Anyway, I'm just saying that perhaps it wouldn't kill them to either a) get their crap done in the beginning when they're supposed to or b) be a little more understanding to the guy who didn't do his paper on-time because he was busy playing Halo...or whatever it is the kids are playing these days.

Things Lost

2007-11-14T07:45:00.000-08:00

There was a Mexican restaurant in Denver, Co, where my roommate and I would go with our friends. Well, they were his friends, but I hung out with them. Or, they were his friends first. They were closer to him. Whatever, they were our friends. Anyway, the restaurant was near our apartment on S. Oneida (Spyglass Hill Apartments, if you care) but, for some reason that probably has to do with the seven years that have passed since then, I can't remember the name of the place. I live between 14 and 16 hours away (depending on how fast you drive and how many times you stop to pee), so it's not like I'm going to pop over for lunch, but if I ever go back it'd be nice to eat there. The food was REALLY good. That has very little to do with my nostalgia for the place, though. You see, the restaurant had this mariachi band that, on Fridays and Saturdays, would stroll through and play while you ate. The novelty in that might be lost if you don't know the place. There were, as I remember, two main eating areas with a bar in between them. I assume this had something to do with smoking and non-smoking, though I don't remember anyone lighting up when I was there. Maybe they'd gone full non-smoking before then. Anyway, the first area had a few booths, nothing special, and was near the front door. The other side had booths and tables.

And it was surely a fire hazard the way they were packed in there.

So, when the band strolled through the second area, they were well within your personal space. I'm not sure why that was a plus, but it certainly was. I've always had a special place in my heart for mariachi music. Probably because of my heritage on my mom's side, but also because the guys in the band always seem to be having fun. How can you not enjoy music (played well) when the band is having so much fun playing it?

When it's country.

But other than that, how can you not? I suppose another reason for my nostalgia is that, like so many other friends I've had since graduating from high school, I've lost touch with all those guys. I often wonder what happened to them, especially my former roommate. I know that, at some point, he and one of the other guys (both former Marines) had considered re-enlisting. Because of that, I worry for their saftey.

Really, in the last eleven years, it's astounding how many friends I've made and lost contact with. One even tracked me down this summer (via email) and I've lost his address since (stupid automatic inbox clearing...). In fact, of all the people who've mattered to me that have become separated from my by geography, Cricket is the only one I've really maintained any real contact with.

How sad is that?

...No, not that it's Cricket, but that there aren't others. Geez. People are always putting words in my mouth...

Strange Things

2007-11-06T16:24:00.000-08:00

It occurs to me that, generally, it's considered bad form to do things that cause others to to incur debt. The larger the debt, the more inconsiderate the offense. There appears, however, to be a break-off point where the debt becomes so large that, under the right circumstances, it becomes welcomed.

I'm referring to the cost of an ambulance. In almost, but certainly not all, cases where an ambulance is warranted, people are more than fine with you calling one for them, running up a tab in the thousands of dollars for a five minute drive. Ten if you count the trip to pick up the patient. But, in most cases, the person calling, or someone in the area, who is certainly closer than an ambulance (because, really, who ever has a medical emergency as one is driving by?), has access to a car that could drive the person in to the hospital.

Not into a hospital.

You've got to watch those prepositions. Go driving someone into a hospital and they're going to need a hospital worse than before. And you'll be needing a new car.

I realize that there are situations where medical professionals need to be on scene taking care of the patient, but I'd personally much rather have someone drive me to the hospital if, say, I got my arm chopped off than wait for an ambulance to arrive. Screw the upholstry! This is my life we're talking about. I'll spring for the OXY activated cleaner if I make it. It's got to be cheaper than an ambulance. That's for sure.

Photomagraphics

2007-11-02T08:34:00.000-07:00

Ok, so here are the promised Halloween pictures. Not that anyone really cares. Anyway, here we see that I look like a bum, my son is, as always, adorable and my wife looks like she deserves better than me.

Actually, it's times like these that I'm glad that we don't live in a country where they consider it a crime to marry above your attractiveness level, because I'd get the death penalty.

Anyway, here's the whole "Sylar" picture. If you need to double check me, episode 3 (One Giant Leap) is what I used as reference, though I suppose I could've done more than just go by memory...

My Name is SYLAR!!!

2007-11-01T16:04:00.000-07:00

So, Halloween...yeah.

Last night, our church did a thing and, since I teach a class that was supposed to be running a booth, we went (it's not like Aaron was old enough to get candy, though, so otherwise, we might not have done much). I suppose, really, I should've been more involved in the booth, but I got caught up in doing Aaron things. Mostly, that just involved carrying him in his spider costume. As cute as he was in it, that thing made it difficult to hold him. And since he was in no mood to be in his stroller, there weren't any other options. He doesn't walk well enough yet (or at least...not far enough) to go around on foot. Originally, Andria and I weren't planning on dressing up either. However, her boss (who I'm pretty sure didn't even show up) convinced her to do something, so she went as a pageant queen. Simple enough, since she had her crown and sash packed from when she was, in fact, a pageant queen. I, on the other hand, had no plans at all, but Andria thought I needed to, so I complied. BUT, I didn't have anything to wear. So, she went to Wal-Mart while I was at work and browsed their remnants. Not much to speak of, but eventually she called with a choice between two capes.

Neither was affiliated with superhero.

So, I decided to do with what I already owned. So, I decided to do something simpler. I'll post a picture later (it's on the camera, but not on a computer), but I went as Sylar. But not just any Sylar. I went SPECIFICALLY as Sylar between episodes 3 and 9 of the first season of Heroes.

The specificity comes because, first, I don't look THAT much like Zachary Quinto. Plus, my hair...too long to spike. So, incognito Sylar it is!

Andria objected because mostly I just looked like nobody. Or a stalker. I did get one "serial killer" which was close enough for me. The one person that would've surely recognized me, my cousin Nathan, was not there, so...I guess I lose.

Like I said before, I'll post some costume pictures later. Happy Dia de los Muertos.

Time to Take a Stand!

2007-10-30T13:24:00.000-07:00

I just had a brilliant idea. One of the major complaints that older people make, especially those who grew up in the sixties, is that my generation (X) and subsequently the batch of kids running around today (they get a new name every time you turn around...I prefer "Infants"...you know who you are) is that we don't care about anything. Sure, we grumble about things like injustice and various political ideals, but compared to those who marched with Martin Luther King, Jr., those who held sit-ins or those who were eventually shot at during the Kent State fiasco...we're not even playing the same game.

That's when it hit me. You see, there are just so many causes, so many things that need to change, that it's hard to find something to really get behind.

That's why I suggest we all get behind no cause at all! We take part in what I have labelled "Non-objective Activism". We'll stage marches and protests. We can have sit-ins and letter writing campaigns. We'll finally make the older generation proud of our effort by protesting...stuff! We'll have slogans on our signs like "Boo!" or "Down with that!" or even "Things gotta change!" It doesn't matter what, because something will! The problems with objective activism is that sometimes you don't get your way and eventually the cause dies because people give up. Not so with non-objective activism. When you protest nothing in particular, you protest everything! If something you're not happy about gets fixed, hooray! But keep protesting because surely something else isn't right, eh? Non-objective activism is the ultimate answer to those who claim that nothing is being done because you're always doing something about it. Whatever it is. Which doesn't even matter!

So, grab some posterboard and giant markers! Start a petition! Picket something! You don't need to be mad about anything in particular, you just need to be mad enough to desire that something changes! Or, as my all-purpose sign will read: This ain't right!

My Evil Plan to Save the World!

2007-10-19T08:50:00.000-07:00

FYI, I've almost finished penciling the first comic of the My Friend Sylar mini-series.

"But Adam...you started that, like, three weeks ago!"

Shut up and die.

In other news, it would appear that El Grillo del Caos took me seriously about my fear of losing my old schedule days, because there hasn't been a new comic since. In fact, it would appear that I've scared him away from all the other days, too.

He is a cautious one.

I am curious where the all-purpose sauce thing is going. I mean, that's a pretty deep mine, if you dig it right. Should be fun.

In Mah Skedewlz...Tayken Mah Daiz!

2007-10-17T09:00:00.000-07:00

Not Tuesday/Thursday, Cricket!!!!

Sure, it's not like I'm USING them, but they were always there for me. Like a dog, waiting patiently at the door for my return. Not like MY dog, who would be hiding the tv remote, peeing on the carpet and destroying any paper goods the cat flipped onto the ground, but a GOOD dog.

Actually, if it'll make him post comics, Cricket is more than welcome to use the full range of days, letting them fall where they may, like pennies from the top of the Empire State building. Apparently, I'm in the mood for simile today. I'm all over them like Sylar on mutant Hero brain.

That one wasn't very good.

One small step for kshk man...

2007-10-08T13:23:00.000-07:00

Aaron took his first steps yesterday. Crawling is still the preferred method of locomotion, but he is growing to appreciate the convenience of what he can reach from an already standing position. Should he be able to chain more than a couple together...God help us all...;)

The Iron Cliche

2007-10-08T13:22:00.000-07:00

Let me preface this by saying that I really like The Iron Giant. I'd managed not to see it until this weekend, but having remedied that, I'm pleased to have watched it.

Ok, so what's up with single mom's working in diners. Almost every tv/movie mom who is without husband (for whatever reason) works in a diner. Do they hand these things out at the hospital? When some girl who gets knocked up by her boyfriend who skips town comes in, do they hand her, along with prenatal vitamins, a handful of applications to Waffle House and such? Is there some arcane law I don't know about? Should something happen to me, would this be Andria's fate?

The diner, as a source of income, seems to be an especially poor choice for a woman on her own with child. First, the hours, as put forth by tv and movies, are inconsistent. Apparently, they only ask the woman who has no one to take care of her children to cover extra shifts. On one hand, I could see that being helpful...more hours = more money. On the other hand, the kid is probably burning the apartment down while she's at work. That or befriending an over-sized robot and bringing nuclear holocaust to your small New England town. Whatever.

The second issue is that, apparently, people who eat at diners are either apt to sexually harass their waitress or they're up to no good in a way completely unrelated to anyone else in the diner but will end with someone driving a truck/bus/SUV through the wall. Or they're carrying a bomb. This isn't what you would call favorable working conditions.

Lastly, no one gets paid well at a diner. The kind of people who eat at diners, according to movies and tv, are not the kind of people who leave big tips. They may even end up robbing the place, only to have Samuel L. Jackson, in his underwear, to force them to return his wallet bearing a rather distinct, expletive filled label embroidered on it. But still, no tips.

If I were Hogarth's mom, or any of the others in the army of single fictional moms, I'd start looking for employment elsewhere.

Alive and Awake

2007-10-05T11:58:00.000-07:00

It's rather disconcerting. This morning, when I woke up....I woke up. I've been more awake today than I've been in a while. I didn't get more sleep. I didn't eat better. I don't know what the difference was, but I was awake. Here's the run-down of my early morning...

6:00 - My alarm goes off. It's set to radio and, unfortunately, that means that sometimes I don't get good enough reception to wake me up.

6:10 - The wind shifts (or something) and suddenly the radio gets enough signal to wake me up. I hop out of bed and make Aaron a bottle, put the dogs out, change his diaper and begin feeding him. During this time, I continue a project I'd been working on for my Dad.

7:10 - Aaron's finished his bottle and drifted off. I've successfully convinced him to stay asleep (for some reason, if I set him down, it's a lot of work to make sure he doesn't jump up awake when he should be sleeping). I give the cat food and fill the dog bowl before hopping into the shower. I'm aware that I'm running 10 minutes behind and need to make up a lot of time.

7:25 - I'm out of the shower and dressed. I'm also quite happy about it because I managed to get out of the shower at about the same time as mornings I am not behind. This puts me back on schedule. I put a pop-tart in the toaster and refill the empty "gravity pack" from the unopened variety pack box. I comb my hair, deodorize and do the last few getting ready things.

7:43 - I'm sitting in the car, looking at the clock. I've kissed my wife goodbye, grabbed my pop-tart and a can of Mt. Dew Game Fuel, run out to the car, run back inside to grab a card I'm sending to my brother and I'm still five minutes AHEAD now.

I still have no idea what I could've possibly done different to make up 15 minutes of time this morning. I was afraid, for a while, that I'd forgotten something, but I'm fully dressed, so that isn't it. I even had time to finish my pop-tart IN THE CAR parked on the upper lot. I didn't have to walk (or run) up the ridiculously steep hill. I just strolled right on in.

Crazy.

In other news, I've been working on characters for My Friend Sylar. I'm good with Sylar and Mohinder, but Peter's face isn't doing if for me yet. I don't know why I'm bothering to do this ahead of time. It's not like they'll be in more than a couple strips each before I move on from it.

Things Impermanent

2007-10-03T14:52:00.000-07:00

I've been watching Reaper. That is, I've watched the two episodes that have been on. I don't see it lasting, though I really have to way of gauging how long things like this would have to live on a lesser network like the CW. That's not to say I'm not enjoying the show. I think it's funny enough. I like the concept. Even the Devil is a likable enough character. The problem is, I can still see this scenario taking place.

It's the day Reaper comes on. Tuesday, I suppose. I don't know. It shows up on the DVR. Anyway, just before it airs, the power goes out and doesn't come back on until after the show ends. Elsewhere, I'm...I dunno, shopping at Wal-Mart (that seems to be the thing I'm usually doing when I'm not at home). There, the power flickers, momentarily, but comes right back on. Later, I get home and notice the power has been off for some amount of time because the microwave needs to be reset. Again (I swear, that thing needs to be reset if a stiff breeze comes along). Anyway, I get everything back to normal and plop down for some tv. And I have no idea I missed the show.

That's what makes me think it won't be around for long. I get invested in things pretty easily, but, even though I like it, I don't feel invested in it. If it went away, I don't know I would notice. Not for a while, anyway.

And it doesn't help that they've made their episode format so obvious. Every episode, towards the end, the Devil will take Sam someplace. While there, someone will die. Every episode, Ben will be injured by the bad guy. There are some other things that slip my mind. Probably something about Sock and his ex trading insults while she offers Sam some kind of information. Oh, at the end of the episode there will be some longing looks shared between Sam and Andi and the Devil will have something to do in that scene.

That's one part that bothers me most. The relationship between Sam and Andi is like Jim and Pam (The Office...duh), except Andi isn't engaged to anyone. Or even dating, from what we've seen. The only thing keeping them apart is that they're both too stupid to ask each other out. Grr. Needless. It's tension for tension's sake!

Get Out of My Head!

2007-10-02T13:57:00.000-07:00

Some people just don't take kindly to telepaths...

Of course, I'm referring to last night's episode of Heroes. I'm really enjoying the new season. I was a little disappointed by how short last night's episode seemed (I was spoiled by the longer premiere, I suppose), but if I'm so into it that I didn't expect it to end already that must be a good thing.

I am, in no small way, intrigued by the new big bad guy of the season. Mostly because I don't have any idea who it could be. A character we haven't been introduced to yet? Possibly. Based on some spoilers I read on line (which are hardly 100% reliable, but pointed at least to things), I had a theory on who it was (a new character, but one we met before he offed Nakamura). That theory, based on some things from the newest episode, lies splattered on the pavement beside Kaito.

In other news, I inadvertently sent an email about chapel to the chaplain instead of to my mother. Fortunately, it makes absolutely no sense at all out of context. Anyway, I wasn't (even in context) saying something bad about it, just that I was surprised by what wasn't happening. Long story.

Don't Forget to Set Your Alarm!

2007-10-01T10:46:00.000-07:00

This is a friendly reminder for Chaos J. Cricket.

HEROES IS ON TONIGHT! DON'T FALL ASLEEP!!!!

Ok. So I've watched the Heroes premiere no less than thrice in the past week and, this morning, I watched The Office premiere for the second time. I feel good about all that. I'd probably feel better about The Office if I hadn't slept through my alarm for half an hour, causing me to watch the show into my "get ready for work time" (the "feed Aaron time" and "watch tv time" in the morning are one and the same...if I'm late to one, I'm late to the other). Still, funny episode. I'm glad I'm into that show.

I'm hoping that today will pick up. So far, it's been pretty crappy. Locked myself out of the house and had to wake up Andria by yelling through the window. Hopefully she was able to get back to sleep, but that doesn't usually happen when I yell through the window. At least, it didn't the one other time I did.

I'm working on a comic. Not an ongoing series like Vapor Lock, but something that I'll probably do a couple one-offs for. The working title is "My Friend Sylar", so I'm sure you can guess what it's going to relate to. It'll have little to do with the source material, except for characters, but I thought of a couple things that should make it fun for a couple comics. The thing is, a couple characters, the title character for one, are pretty much one-joke characters. So, it could be the next Garfield.

Also, today is my brother's birthday. If you happen to see him, unlikely, wish him a happy one.

Human Sacrifice, Dogs and Cats Living Together...

2007-09-24T10:25:00.000-07:00

...Mass hysteria!

So, apparently the planets have aligned, for this week carries many of the greatest of all geekly events ON TOP OF EACH OTHER! I refer to, among others, the first episodes of Heroes Season 2, The Office Season 4, and the debut of Halo 3. I don't even own an X-Box (much less a 360) and I'm excited about that!

...Actually, I don't even KNOW someone with a 360!

Then, there are the new shows. To be honest, my Heroes-inspired insanity has kept me from being all that aware of them, but Chuck (the tv show) looks especially promising. Reaper also looks like it has potential, but that's one I'm especially wary of. Some shows sound good on paper and then crap out in execution. Not to mention celebrity directors make me nervous. Especially on first episodes. I can stomach them during sweeps, but the first episode? Ride your own wave, man!

Not to mention, Cricket is suddenly doing comics again! Astounding!

Still, it almost doesn't seem fair that EVERYONE gets to see Heroes start tonight. ...er...Everyone in the US, anyway. Le Cricket, for instance has only been watching Heroes for, what? Two weeks? I've also heard unconfirmed rumors that tonight's episode may also be on the DVD set, though I couldn't say for sure. Being broke, and all. It's bad enough that he didn't have to sit through the month and a half long breaks between episodes, but now, he doesn't even have to wait through the summer off-season!

GRAVE INJUSTICE!

In the name of fairness, I demand that he ONLY watch Heroes on DVD. Thus, he will have to wait until early next September!

As the Refreshments once sang, that seems fair...

Insanity Doodle!

2007-09-20T09:45:00.000-07:00

I blame sleep deprivation.

There have been things lately that I've wanted to rant about, but I haven't been able to focus much lately. Also, I fell asleep in my supervisor's office yesterday. I am particularly psyched to see all the new episodes of my favorite shows next week. The summer season was good to me; I thoroughly enjoyed Psych and Eureka, started getting hooked on the likely dead The 4400, and even took interest in Kyle XY, which is a little too teen soap opera-y for my tastes, but the conspiracy stuff was a good stopgap for the time. It's nice that there are two more episodes of Eureka left to help me transition into the new season of all the shows I've been dying to see (Heroes and The Office, especially), though the transition was something I really could've used a couple months ago between the end of the regular season and the beginning of the new one. Then again, I'd never seen Psych until this summer, so it was new to me until they started the actual new stuff. I'm trying not to pee myself when I think about the new Heroes season, especially. I can't help but think I'm going to be let down, though. Last season, I was sure it was going to stink, so I didn't REALLY start watching until the fourth episode, though I saw most of all of them. It's just that it was episode 3 before I decided I'd start caring about it (can't be too careful with TV, you know). This season, I KNOW it was already good, so now they have to live up to that. Then again, the Kensei "documentary" on the Yagamoto Fellowship site has been cool. John Rhys-Davies is narrating it. After the "what we did this summer" commercial for The Office, I'm pretty excited about that, too. It, along with a slew of Heroes stuff, is available on YouTube.

Search it for your own dang self, you lazy bum.

To the Batcave!

2007-09-15T22:51:00.000-07:00

Halloween is coming up, Aaron's first. In planning for it, we've come across a few cute costumes. One that's in the running is this one. It's my favorite, so far, though I know Andria wants to use this spider outfit. It's cute, too, to be sure, but it's just a fluffy gray mass (with a web pattern embroidered into it) around his body with plush legs and a cap that looks like the spider's head. There's nothing wrong with it, though, when he's crawling, the lack of webbing on the back makes him kind of look like a full dog tick. Not a cute image. Still, since he'll probably want to be something cool when he's older, Andria's inclined to put him in something cutsy while she can...and I'm not inclined to stop her. Still, I love this picture...

9

2007-09-13T20:09:00.000-07:00

Aaron is 9 months old today. That's extremely cool. The little guy is all over the place, which is fun to watch. He's gotten to be a little daredevil, or as much as one can be when they can't walk. Of course, that may just be a means-to-an-end from his love of all things tech. He loves cell phones and remotes and gadgets. He seems to think that the proper way to interface with them is orally, which is in error, but he'll catch on eventually.

He has yet to fit the computer in his mouth, for which I am grateful.

My boss mentioned that Aaron has now been out as long as he was in, which is approximately true. Perhaps it is because I'm not a terribly sunshiny person, that brought to mind that it's also been only slightly longer than Aaron's 9 months that my grandfather passed away. I wish I'd known him better. I can't help but think that we could've impacted each other in beneficial ways that I'll never know now. I miss him, as I have for years.

I guess that's the way it has to be when you don't live near family and you lack the ability to pop over and visit whenever.

I still wish Aaron had met him.

Ok, Not THAT Alive...

2007-09-12T09:16:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's up with the lack of comics. I do know that I am consistently thwarted in my attempts to make with the comicking, but that only covers my side. Yesterday, for instance, I was trying to draw in chapel, it's what I always do, when one of the student gestapo made me put it away. Apparently, as a staff member, I do not have immunity to certain rules. It's unfortunate that I am largely unable to focus my attention without the ability to draw in chapel, as well.

I know, having a distraction so that I can pay attention sounds counterintuitive, but it works for me. If Aaron was there, bouncing him around and such to keep him quiet would also work, but he doesn't go to college here.

You know, because he's a baby.

I'm sure that the attention thing signifies something, but your guess is as good as mine as to what. The common suspect is ADD in most cases, but I don't completely fit that profile. I think it has to do, partially at least, with TV training. The scene doesn't change often enough in classes and such for me to maintain strict attention. The thing is, it doesn't bother me that I can't give 100% attention. I LIKE drawing while listening. The product of the drawing time usually helps anchor the thing learned until it sticks in more permanent storage. And, of course, it's nice to have something drawn.

This time, however, it turned out that I didn't need to draw to pay attention. It seems that mild embarrassment and frustration make a decent substitute.

Just not as productive a one.

IT'S ALIVE!

2007-09-04T16:07:00.000-07:00

Well, if Cricket can refrain from breaking it again, everything should be smooth sailing at Dim Bulb from here on out.

That's asking a lot, though...

Where in the World is Cricket Sandiego?

2007-08-28T09:48:00.000-07:00

So, supposedly the Cricket of Chaos has returned to his humble abode. Of course, this has not alleviated our site problems and, honestly, I'm not entirely convinced there's anything he can do about it. I have a request in for someone at CG to fix it...again, but since I put that in over a week ago, I decided to try uploading all the comics (save the latest one that no one has seen but Cricket and, presumably, Mrs. Cricket) and having them overwrite the broken ones.

It didn't work.

So, I guess, for now, we wait.

Totally Not Me...

2007-08-22T21:12:00.000-07:00

I suggested that Cricket use a particular Firefox plug-in FTP. It's what I used to put up the Diff'rent Strokes and Cheney things.

Notice how MINE showed up AND didn't break the site.

Totally not my fault.

Many (un)Happy Returns

2007-08-22T09:50:00.000-07:00

Against my better judgment, I went back to the neighbors' house. Apparently, I don't learn. This time was less embarrassing, but still unsatisfying. The first time, we were trying to unload a stray dog on them. Instead, we ended up keeping the dog. He's cute enough. This time, I was after the flour container we loaned them a couple weeks back (they'd come asking for a little flour just after we'd returned from our Anniversary trip and the house was a wreck, so...we let them borrow the whole thing). Shouldn't have wasted the time. Apparently, they tried washing it in the dishwasher and melted it. For this to have happened, they would have had to have been unaware that the dishwasher uses very hot water and that thin plastic containers need to be put on the top rack. I knew this. I don't even have a dishwasher. I AM the dishwasher.

Except when Andria is.

Anyway, so now we have to find a new one. It's too bad, because it was rather handy and they don't have that set at Wal-Mart anymore.

Gah! Cricket, you killed it again!

2007-08-17T14:06:00.000-07:00

I wasn't sure it was you before, but something in your FTP program's settings made all the comics disappear like it did after you uploaded the sketch before. It's somehow set to make them only viewable to certain people, who I am not one of. Nor is anyone else. Maybe you. I'm not sure.

Should You Ever...

2007-08-16T12:42:00.000-07:00

If, at any time, you are ever interrupted, say, by a knock at the door, in the midst of a delicate moment...er...a private time...ok, if you're in the middle of sex...don't answer the door. But if you must, don't answer the door in your underwear. And if you must also do that, don't answer the door in your underwear and try to carry on a conversation with the interrupter whilst "hiding" behind your near-nakedness behind a glass door. I don't care if it's frosted glass. It's still bloody glass. Besides, they'll probably put together what you'd been doing and they're certainly uncomfortable about the fact. There's no need to add to the awkwardness by prolonging the moment.

I'm just saying...if that should ever happen to you...

And if you're the interrupter, it's probably best just to run away.

Man, that sucks.

2007-08-13T13:24:00.000-07:00

Mike Wieringo died yesterday. He's been one of my favorite artists since his work on Spider-Man back in the late '90s. I got as many of his Robin back issues as I could and tried to get my hands on anything he drew. I've been following him on his blog, and I'm pretty stunned.

He was one of the best.

Gasp Chuck! CHUCK!!!!

2007-08-10T14:24:00.000-07:00

HOLY CRAP! Third character over (you'll have to click the portrait to get the character's name)! Mayday! Mayday!

Note from Monday

2007-08-09T08:22:00.000-07:00

Ok, so Monday was the 3rd anniversary of my marriage to Andria, which was pretty cool. We spent it in a rather unorthodox fashion, but a good time was had.

First thing, which is to say after we crawled out of bed around noon, we went to White Water, a water park in Branson, Mo, which is where we were staying. Conveniently, White Water was located straight across the street.

And we still drove there.

Anyway, what amused me most about it all was that apparently Germ-X has sponsored the park because outside all the restrooms there are rather large stations with Germ-X hand sanitizer for you to use and, on the backdrop for it, some slogan about preventing the spread of, you got it, germs.

I laughed when I saw it because we were LITERALLY swimming in each other's filth and they expect us to believe that a little squirt of Germ-X on our hands is gonna make everything ok.

And next time a dam breaks, you should go throw a bath sponge at it.

That'll help.

Overstayed Welcome

2007-08-08T07:23:00.000-07:00

For those of you who keep track of the links bar on this here blog/rantspace/thing, you may notice that it is now just a wee bit shorter. I decided to cut Year One loose. It hasn't updated in a while and I absolutely detest the "art" of the guest comic it ended with. So...a big

SCREW YOU!

to Year One.

I've got stuff about my second vacation, the one in which my wife and I celebrated anniversary #3, but it'll have to wait.

Vacation Particles

2007-07-31T08:53:00.000-07:00

Death Drive

I find, as I age, that I'm less and less capable of staying up past the grandfatherly hour of 11pm (or even up to it at times). This is probably due, in no small part, to the fact that I've been getting less sleep since Aaron was born. You'd think that, having a baby, this would be expected. You'd be right, but wrong in assuming that he was the cause of it. In fact, I can find no particular reason why I've been missing sleep of late and it's somewhat alarming. Of course, he was at fault the night before we left for Vegas, so that made driving to Amarillo (our first stop) tricky. However, there were far less occurrences throughout the trip of the dreaded asleep with eyes open condition that I've experienced in the past. Far less. That, however, didn't make the couple that did happen any more comforting.

More alarming, however, was when my car unexpectedly overheated at Cuervo, NM. I hadn't noticed the temperature gauge spiking, so I was surprised as I pulled into the gas station for a refill to see the water and coolant my car so desperately needed gushing onto the pavement. The day before our return trip ('cause I put everything off to the last minute) I replaced the thermostat with the help of her cousin. That is to say, I watched as he did the real work.

I did burn my thumb, though.

Vegas, baby! VEGAS!

Suffice to say, Vegas has earned every last bit of it's reputation. Andria and I lost a combined total of $9 (unless you count the $10 she was up on the slots at one point) and that even includes her $5 bingo game (her grandmother's choice). I got to play Empire Strikes Back on the slots at the Stratosphere, which was cool, though not being able to go up to the top of the tower because we were 3 minutes late to the ticket counter (we'd passed it before, but the shrouded kiosks blocked our view of it as we rushed to the elevator at the end of an extremely long walkway) because nobody at the elevator up knew where we'd get tickets.

Morons.

Andria's family was great, as usual. We had a few minor comfort issues (apparently, most houses are not built to sleep an entire familial group with ease), but that was hardly a bother. It was nice eating at Jack-in-the-Box, too. We need one of those around here. They have a bacon variant on almost all their items.

Including their shakes!

Ok, not really the shakes.

The two things that did bother me were that, first, my brother-in-law's girlfriend stated that she would in no way take $1 million dollars from Donald Trump, were he to offer it, merely because she didn't like him, and second that he referred to the Bush divorce while speaking of his personal feelings about George W. Honestly, I can let the second slide. I mean, when you watch almost no news, sometimes it's hard to remember where you saw what headline and something from The Globe might sneak in. It's really the first that blew my mind. If Osama bin Laden himself offered me $1 million, no strings attached, I'd be running to the bank. Mind you, I'd turn it down in a heartbeat if even someone generally considered to be a saint offered it with the stipulation that I do something I would feel to be wrong.

Well, maybe two heartbeats...I got bills, man...

The Devil be my Guide

I love technology. I do. Anything that can remove some of the tedium from life and free up some time to do something preferable is a good thing in my book. Unfortunately, anything new can cause problems. If the technology is new, it often has glitches. If the user is new, well, I'm sure we've all seen the effects of inexperience before, even when the user is quicker on the uptake than the standard.

That said, our trip was guided less by a printed map from Yahoo! along with ye olde Rand-McNally, and more by my father's Palm with a GPS....er...doohickey (totally technical). Most of the time, it was great. However, when Andria and I decided at the last minute to take a side trip up to Las Vegas, NM, things got a little weird. Our little detour looked innocent enough, at first. I mean, you could see the road on the map, which seemed like a good sign, so I wasn't too worried when it turned out to be a windy two lane road with no shoulder. Indeed, I wasn't even bothered when we entered a small town either called Villanueva or El Cerrito (Yahoo maps has it listed as both in the "hybrid" view). I even tried to stay optimistic when we turned onto a dirt road, though as the rocks grew larger and the hills and valleys steeper I found that to be a bit more difficult. Then, we hit a gate. The road went through private property and had been locked off.

Huh?

After a moment or two of consideration, we headed back until we saw a guy in a truck coming from a side road. He seemed rather eager to help, probably because we were the first people he'd seen all day, and gave us new directions. It turns out the road DID at one time go off in our previous direction, but then they closed that road off in favor of a newer version of the same road. So, we headed off in the direction he pointed and the road continued with it's rocks the size of a jet ski. This was no longer new to us, so we weren't concerned until we saw "The Hill". I'd been warned about the hill by the friendly rancher, but he said it was nothing we couldn't handle, so long as we took it slow. He failed to mention that it was a gravelly mess, at a 45 degree angle and that the road was no wider than our car as it wound down the side of a mountain with a 100+ foot drop where the shoulder would be.

So, yeah, that sucked.

Then, it turns out that if we'd just set the preferences to "real road" or "don't kill me, please" we might've taken an actual highway. Silly technology...

Truth in Advertising

2007-07-18T13:59:00.000-07:00

My mouth is on fire.

Of course, I am not literally emitting flames from my oral cavity, merely expressing via word picture that the chips that I just ate are, indeed, spicy, but you knew that. What you may not have known is that my vacation hate list was also not meant as expressed. I do hate most of the country I have to drive through while on vacation, a major reason for why I opt to do a lot of night driving, but I haven't ever, in memory, had a vacation where I didn't visit some family. Unless you count the honeymoon or our brief anniversary trips, which I don't.

Family most certainly isn't invited on those.

What may come as a shock to you is the fact that I am often given to hyperbole and, when that isn't enough, lying for effect. I'm not a funny man, but that doesn't stop me from trying. In fact, I've nearly completed my transition from "guy who thinks he can draw" to "guy who thinks he can write," though I'll likely always dabble in both.

Mostly, though, I'm just covering my butt so that no one thinks that I'm not looking forward to going on vacation this weekend. Frustrating as it has the possibility of being (based on the few based-in-reality gripes from before), it sure beats hanging around here for the week.

Vacation of Folly

2007-07-17T14:13:00.000-07:00

People have such odd ideas about vacations. They spend the whole year looking forward to them, saving up their time and money so they can go some place and do some thing. They treat it as if that week or two a year is going to undo the other 50 weeks worth of trauma caused by the crushing reality of adulthood.

What they fail to remember is that the vacation itself is more apt to crush souls than the job could ever.

Allow me to explain:

First of all, you have to plan for a vacation. This involves investigating destinations, plotting courses, figuring out what you're going to do when you're there and deciding whether or not it's worth it to take a vacation at all. That last one usually comes up near the end of preparations. Not only that, but this is when a large chunk of change gets dropped. If you fly, you've got to pay for your ticket ahead of time. If you drive, you've got to make sure your vehicle is in working order. You need to check and see if you have a swimsuit for warm climates, heavy coats for cold. You have to invest in sunscreen, snacks, travel games, and various other things that you don't just have. A cooler, for instance.

Then, you have to pack. Nothing sucks more than packing. It isn't JUST that you have to figure out a way to fit enough clothes to live in for the time you'll be gone, because there's no telling if you'll find facilities to launder them and spending vacation time at a laundromat is no fun. No, it's also that you have to decide what it is you'll need to have packed, just in case. For instance, you may be going to sunny Florida, but what if a hurricane blows in? Do you have a heavy-duty raincoat? And what if you forget your toiletries? Those little bottles of hotel "shampoo" (which is more like corn syrup mixed with your grandmother's perfume) and the disposable razors you can obtain at the front desk (or at Wal-Mart if you're staying at a Super 8) are hardly a substitute for what you usually use. And it gets worse if you accidentally leave your good stuff there!

Once you leave, it doesn't get any better. People always say they want to "go to..." (insert location here). What they mean is, they want to be in (same location). Airports are a nightmare. The threat of a full cavity search is enough to put anyone on edge, and that can be bad news for people who say inappropriate things in stressful situations. And it's not like traveling horror is limited to the airways. Nobody enjoys long distance driving unless they're an AARP member and they're in an RV.

And those are the people ruining it for the rest of us.

Even with the interstate system linking all the places you'd want to go, you don't want to actually have to see them. This isn't only due to anticipation of the destination. Sure, that's a large part, but, seriously, it's boring out there!

Which brings up another annoyance: those games people play on the road. It's bad enough you're crammed in a four foot by five and a half foot space with people who also don't want to be on the road for hour. Why would you want to add in a six hour marathon of I Spy or license plate Bingo? And slug-bug (aka punch buggy to some of you weirdos) always degenerates into a fight.

This, of course, is only broken up by the occasional pit stop. This is not without its own complications. First of all, one restroom is almost always out of order and, for some reason, women don't like using the men's room almost as much as they don't want men using theirs. This is, I suppose, due to the fact that women are ashamed of how nasty they make their restrooms (the atrocities I saw in the women's room at the grocery store I worked for shall haunt me the rest of my days). That, or they don't want to share the couches.

What's that all about anyway? Women sit down to pee already! Do they really need to take a load off before they take a load off?

And there's those four words that haunt any driver..."Are we there yet?" It's not like the driver isn't also ready to be out of the steel and fiberglass deathtrap that is a modern motor vehicle. Usually, the driver has some sort of time investment in the trip, such as vacation days, which would be better spent being somewhere, so the added question of whether or not the group has arrived, which it clearly hasn't, is almost enough to make anyone swerve into the nearest gas tanker.

Then, you get there. Sure, you have the opportunity to do the things you planned for in the beginning...half of which won't pan out...but it's going to cost you the other arm and most of the other leg to do those things. And that's to say nothing of having your sleep disrupted. Nobody goes to bed, eats, pees, whatever...on the same schedule as they do at home. I'll bet Ex-Lax makes a killing in the post-vacation market. And hotel pillows are bad, almost across the board. Not as bad as the rolled sandpaper the leave for you to wipe with, but still pretty bad. Of course, you could stay with family (should you have family where you're going), but that means you have to put up with family and that's just the kind of stress that makes us need vacations in the first place. I mean, not only are there the usual personality conflicts, but also the conflicting interests and schedules. If one group is on vacation, the other's presence in their own home usually means that they are not. Do you wait for them to get free so you can hang out, or do you do your thing and see them on your way to bed? Is it rude to want to have your bloody vacation when you're on vacation?

And then it's time to pack. Again. Of course, now you've not only got all your dirty clothes, but all the crap you bought that will be taking up space in a closet at home because God only knows what you were thinking when you spent $50 on a water bong shaped like the Dali Llama.

Finally, you get home, worn out from either driving too long or sick from sitting in an airplane, trapped for hours with some outbreak monkey who didn't have the good sense, or the common courtesy, to stay their butt home. But, the good news is, it's back to the grind tomorrow! You can just make up for the lost rest next year!

That Doesn't Work!

2007-07-11T14:43:00.000-07:00

Item #1: The dog likes cat food and the cat likes dog food.

To be honest, I understand where the dog is coming from. The cat's food is like the forbidden fruit, except that I give her some every time I feed the cat, so, of course, she's going to go crazy for it. The cat, on the other hand, doesn't make sense. She eats the dog food just because. Well, I suppose, it could be out of spite. She does hate...everything with a fiery passion, but without her claws while being saddled with the inborn need to remain immobile as often as possible common in cats, even the effort it takes to eat the dog's food seems a bit much for her.

Item #2: That's TV for you...

I was watching an episode of The Dead Zone this morning as I gave Aaron his early morning bottle, the bottle I get up at 6am for, and I noticed in the conclusion that there was an oddity. Apparently, wherever the show is set (I've only seen a handful of episodes and never the old movie), vandalism and terroristic threatening are NOT offenses which can land you in jail. The basic story for this episode, for those of you who don't watch it, was that Johnny the psychic guy's son, JJ (who does not recognize him as "Dad" but as a genetic donor), was skipping soccer to stalk an acrobat girl at the local circus (let's forget for a second that this town doesn't look like it could sustain a continuous circus, yet the owner talked like it had been there a while...but it was early and I may've misunderstood). So Johnny goes to see what's up and ends up meeting an old friend who, in the time since they knew each other, killed a girl. Another man, who had gone to jail for the murder, was back and kept shattering mirrors and doing things to spook the real murderer into confessing. This brings us back to the end where, after the vandal was captured, the real murderer confesses and is arrested. Just before his capture, vandalman had messed with the rigging on a swing knowing that as soon as murderman's weight was on it, it would snap, falling all of a couple feet, since it wouldn't hold him long enough for the swing to be raised by the pulley. Well, since murderman was in jail, the acrobat girl and went to show off in front of JJ who, thanks to Johnny, had ceased his stalking and tried talking to the girl. Well, the rigging starts snapping and vandalguy was trying to fix it and then trying to hold the cable with his bare hands and does so long enough for Johnny to lend half a second's help before the girl falls and lands on JJ. All this to say, vandalguy should've been back in the pokey and the girl should've ended up dead. Thankfully, laws mean nothing on TV.

Item #3: Feh, coworkers.

I work with this unbearable woman...well, no...that's not entirely true. She works here. I work here. But, we don't work at the same time. Usually. Anyway, she somehow tricked some higher ups into having her come in during the summer (she's usually off) a couple days a week, this month and next. Tuesday was supposed to be the first, so, of course, she called in sick. Apparently, she just needed to have more days she could not come to work on, since there are only so many days during the rest of the year. So much truancy, so little time.

Item #4: Auto-NO-bile

My vacation plans changed, rather suddenly, last week. Originally, Andria and I were going to use my one week (I used the other one I'm allotted last year with its 2 weeks) to...well, I'm not actually sure. But, we weren't going anywhere far or for all of the time. Just enough to enjoy our 3rd Anniversary. Now, we're going to Vegas (baby! VEGAS!!!! ) . Unfortunately, that means getting the car checked and then repaired, because it can never NOT need repairs. So, I'm staring down the barrel of $300+ bill and I know it's got another $150 in tires still in the cartridge.

And Nothing but the Tooth...

2007-07-09T16:12:00.000-07:00

So, the little guy is teething. It's always fun to see him passing these little milestones, but I really wish he wasn't going by them so bleeding fast. Seven months used to seem like an eternity. Now it's just a flash. He does so many things that I'm sure he's not supposed to do yet, mostly because I'm not ready for him to, and it's frustrating. Not because I don't think I've been taking advantage of my time with him...I'm a good father, at least to a baby...but because there's hardly time to savor the flavor of each new thing before another comes rolling down the pipes.

I love me a good mixed metaphor.

Of course, I constantly worry about him. Mostly because there are certain kinks in our system that we haven't worked out yet. He's the first and that makes him the guinea pig.

I should know.

And then, there's the worry about what unfortunate traits I've unwittingly passed on to him. For instance, I have what could be described as symptoms of ADD. They come from a different place, but with similar results. That probably contributes to the fact that I rarely write one of these posts in less than three bursts.

Usually more.

Also, I forget where I'm going with this. And that's sad, because it was amusing when I was thinking of it...seven hours ago.

And Now a Word From...

2007-06-28T08:55:00.000-07:00

Our Mayflies are Huge Because They Come in Late June...

2007-06-27T09:52:00.000-07:00

...And you should see our june bugs. They get here in December.

More the Man

2007-06-22T09:30:00.000-07:00

I got to use a chainsaw yesterday. I could feel the testosterone surge as the wood chips flew.

Had to watch chick flicks all night just to bring me back down.

WARNING: IMAGE ONSLAUGHT!

2007-06-19T09:42:00.000-07:00

But, first, a brief explanation. These were done for my pastor, who is speaking at a children's church camp this week. In the mornings, he is teaching them a system for remembering the books of the New Testament (that's the second part...not half...of the Bible which is occasionally distributed by itself with Psalms and Proverbs as bonus books).

I don't understand the system at all. I think it's going to confuse the crap out of them, but...I had fun drawing it all. So, here they are, in order of appearance...

I could try to explain some of them, but the explanations are flimsy. Like I said, the kid's will probably just be confused, but at least they'll have some funny pictures to see.

C'est Fini

2007-06-18T16:08:00.000-07:00

I managed to complete that massive project Saturday night around midnight. Actually, I think it was afterward, making it, technically, Sunday, but that may've been when I finished taking pictures of the drawings

Drawings, I might add, which are NOT feature on this post.

Instead, I have a picture of my son contemplating the wonders he might find inside the large beverage container in his grasp. I am sure he was unaware of the possibility that he would more than likely be wearing the contents if he attempted to partake of them, but since he didn't try, he didn't find out.

That may be because I took it away from him. After the picture, of course.

I'm a little nervous about the drawings, though. Not only because I'm not 100% thrilled with them (I could've finished more faster and with better quality if I'd been able to do them on the computer), but also because, as it turns out, I may've gotten carried away and drawn one TOTALLY wrong. I'll find out when I get home and compare what I know I drew to what the list says I was supposed to have drawn and then see how I can cover my butt. If I can get the computer to cooperate, I'll have an image heavy post with all of them here in the next couple days.

Let's just get it out of the way now, though. I am not happy with the cow in the least. That was one of the victims of working on such a large scale in such a short time. There are others, but I think it is the most glaring.

C'est la vie.

P.S. French is a stupid, stupid language. It's like Spanish, only unnecessarily complicated.

Fashion

2007-06-12T13:46:00.000-07:00

Dressing, for my mother, is a marathon event. It requires training and self-discipline and denial of all else in favor of it. She can be so late to an event that she misses it entirely because she was fine-tuning her outifit.

This seems like a colossal waste of effort to me.

This morning, she was 15 minutes late to work because she couldn't get her outfit perfect so that she could secretize* for a handful of science professors who, other than covering their nakedness, have no idea how to use clothing.

Thank God they got that much.

.....Eughhhh....

This isn't to say that I can fault her for caring about her appearance. I mean, a little moderation would be nice; a little recognition of the fact that nobody really cares 99.54% of the time, but a lot of people don't really put much effort into looking like they WEREN'T just backed over by a dump truck. Of course, this has made its way into my life, as well. I don't know that I've ever been late because of getting dressed, but I don't like going out in public if I haven't shaved, for instance. There have been a few odd mornings lately where tiredness and time worked against me and I went to work without combing my hair (good thing it's really short), and I'd fix it at lunch time. Mostly, I'm just especially self-conscious about my thinning hair. I don't at all relish the prospect of being bald. Most guys who look young do not look good bald. Ron Howard has only recently aged into his baldness, for example.

I do like wearing fashionable clothes, though. Granted, the fashions I tend towards are usually those of a high school kid, not that I wear that stuff that often, but I've always been a t-shirt and jeans guy, so it only stands to reason that advances in that area would pique my interest.

I guess this means that if you ever see me wandering around in a bath robe, the world is probably going to end.

Unless someone buys me this bathrobe, which I would gladly wear even to work.

*Secretize - What one does when they are a secretary

Panictown

2007-06-06T13:35:00.000-07:00

I mentioned in my previous post how I'd gotten an order for some paid art. The order is for 27 pictures conforming to specific concepts (though the layout and style is all me) on a very, very large flip-pad. And to have it done for the Monday after Fathers' Day.

Holy crap.

Since he may be leaving on Sunday afternoon (I don't know for sure), plus the fact that I don't want to spend my first Fathers' Day as an actual dad working (even if it is drawing), I have, from the point that I got all the materials from him, 12 days to finish. That works out to at least 2 pages every day with three others to be done at some point in the midst. Essentially, that means I started out three pages in the hole and, since yesterday I had to do some shopping for things we need for the house which kept me from drawing, to get back to zero, I'd have to draw 7 pages today.

Gah!!!

That's the 3 bonus pages plus yesterday's 2 and today's 2. And since I help out in the youth department at church (and since it'd be bad form to skip in favor of drawing with the commission coming from the preacher and all...), I'll be lucky if I get today's 2 done.

The upside is that I've already got thumbnails of over half of them done, so I won't have to waste time trying to put the concept on paper. That will be a huge time-sink when I run to the end of those. I need to get back on track before I finish...16, I think.

Hoo...boy....I'm in trouble.

Inviso-Monkey

2007-06-04T14:44:00.000-07:00

It occurs to me that my presence here is almost as unnecessary as it is unnoticed. I haven't properly drawn a comic in nearly a year and a half now. What I did draw has shuffled off to that place where things go to die in obscurity.

You know, that same place where all the comics I've almost done in the aforementioned year and a half have gone.

I keep holding out hope that somehow I'll start making comics again, but it isn't happening. The only story I'm particularly interested in (working title: The Art of Self-Destruction) really wouldn't work as a comic. At least, not as I've conceived it. For comics, I don't have the time to tell the stories I want to tell. The first chapter (especially) of Troubled Times shows what happens when I try to rush a comic book-style strip.

It's pretty ugly.

That leaves shorter strip-style comics, like Vapor Lock. Except, at the end, I was working VL away from that. The thing is, I know exactly where it would pick up. I knew it a year ago. I even drew up new character designs for the cast reflecting that things had changed in the interim. I don't have time to draw them in that style, though. In fact, chances are that artistically, VL vol. 3 would be a step backwards as far as where I want to go is concerned. The same would be true of almost any strip I could do.

So, I'm still stuck.

Fortunately, I'll at least have something artish to do for the next couple weeks (probably). My preacher asked me to draw some illustrations for a camp he's speaking at. A little short notice, considering how many he wants. Heck, short notice for me, no matter the number, but I think it sounds fun.

Plus, he offered to pay. And, to quote Cutler Beckett, "Currency is the currency of the realm."

Vague Warnings and Finished Things

2007-05-30T13:32:00.000-07:00

I started a new stick of deodorant the other day. Usually, I don't think much of it. I just remove the lid, pull that little plastic plug off the top and swipe it around my underarm area. For some reason, though, I noticed a message pressed into the stick. I've seen them before, but never paid much attention. This time, it caught my eye, saying "Take the risk".

What risk?

Does the deodorant know something about the future that I don't? I'm not entirely comfortable with a hygiene product that knows more about my destiny than I do.

Or is it just saying I need to shoplift a certain war-based board game?

Anyway, turned 29 on Monday. Saw Pirates of the Caribbean 3. Or, really, Pirates of the Caribbean 2b, since the second one really didn't have much of an end to it. Less so than most movies in the middle of a trilogy. I mean, think about it...

The Empire Strikes Back

Luke's Jedi training........finished
Rescuing Han and Leia........finished (not entirely successfully, but still...)
Han and Leia's admissions of love (well, as much as Han is ready to do to this point)..........finished

All that's left hanging is Han's fate and the trilogy arc with Luke and Vader. Another one...

Back to the Future, Part II

Sports almanac..........finished
Fixing the present...............finished

The one thing that was left was what happened to Doc and how Marty was going to get home...which was only introduced at the end as a teaser for Part III.

PotC 2 had none of that, so I couldn't, a year ago, tell you if it was a good movie or not. Entertaining for the 2 hours or so that I watched it, surely. But it wasn't until I saw "3" that I could tell you how the 2nd should be judged.

However, I have to say, it is good.

Highlight for me.......best film wedding. Ever.

Solutions Abound

2007-05-24T10:14:00.000-07:00

I've been hearing a lot about how they're going to change the movie ratings system so that movies with "excessive smoking" will get a higher rating like movies with people getting disemboweled do. At first, this struck me as a bit silly. I mean, sure, I'm as anti-smoking as the next guy (unless that guy is a smoker...then it just doesn't work), but...well...it seemed like maybe they're a bit...I dunno...crazy about it. However, after having a few days to mull it over, I came up with a better solution, and it's all thanks to Steven Spielberg.

For those of you who just didn't care, when they re-released E.T. a couple years ago, they digitally editted some scenes. In some cases, it was to make E.T. seem more realistic, like a bathtub scene where the pores on the rubber puppet were releasing bubbles. However, the scene that made the biggest splash as far as the news was concerned was the chase scene where the Federal agents were trying to catch E.T. and E.T. makes Elliot and his friends fly to get away. In the original, the agents all had guns. Spielberg thought, as he was preparing the new version, that it seemed unrealistic and excessive to have all these grown men with guns trying to stop a few kids.

Apparently, Spielberg doesn't think that they might want the guns for the alien who can make kids fly.

Anyway, since he didn't like the idea, he got rid of them and gave the agents hand-held radios. A little wussy, but a good solution. And that got me thinking. Instead of changing the ratings, we can just take out the cigarettes and replace them, too. At first, I thought it would be a simple matter of replacing all the cigarettes with these:

And that seemed like a good idea, at first....but then I thought about it. Sometimes a sucker isn't appropriate. For one thing, they aren't very manly. Can you imagine Humphrey Bogart sucking on a lollipop in The Maltese Falcon? Sure, Bogey would certainly lend a bit of toughness to it, but not everyone could pull it off. Jean-Claude Van Damme certainly wouldn't.

Does he ever smoke in movies? ...What am I saying, he's French...of course he does.

Actually, that raises a lot of questions about the tough image associated with smoking, but I digress.

So I began to think of alternatives. A couple sprang to mind:

Now, I have to admit, they still lack that je ne sais quoi that's necessary to convey the Bogey image, but for most actors, it'll do. Plus, it sends a healthy message to the kids about eating their veggies. But, it would be irresponsible of me to have left it at that, since Bogart was my example and I had yet to find a cigarette replacement for him.

Then it hit me.

Only one substance could possibly match that no-nonsense attitude and overall manliness that Humphrey Bogart exuded.

Heroes Finale Short - Spoily

2007-05-22T08:19:00.000-07:00

Upon second viewing, the finale was excellent. The music as Petey preps to go boom, called poignant by the captions, started out a bit sappy, but once the rest of the Heroes music effects joined in, it was better. I can't wait until next season. Good stuff, man. Good stuff.

I Need a Hero...

2007-05-21T23:07:00.000-07:00

***Spoilers for those of you too lazy to watch tv when it's on...

Well, Heroes, Volume One, is over. Good episode. Not sure if I'm satisfied, but I'm going to watch it again in the morning while I'm feeding Aaron, so I'll be sure to have a more full feeling tomorrow. Of corse, I think I'd be happier if there'd been more spectacular use of powers, like the 5 Years Gone fight between Peter and Sylar that we didn't get to see, but, then, Peter is hardly capable of that kind of control, still.

Obviously.

It seems pretty safe to write-off Nathan as far as returning characters go. I mean, sure, you have to respect the old comic law that states that if you don't see a corpse, then it's still up in the air (of course, even then it isn't set in stone). It was nice that he finally made a good choice. He had such potential and yet he was always such a...there has to be a non-expletive laden expression for him, but words fail me.

I was glad to see that Ando survived. Especially later in the season, he became a very likable character. Hopefully, he'll be back once Hiro is back.

You know what I mean.

I thought the manhole cover bit at the end of Volume One, before Two kicked off, was a nice touch. Very comic book. Plus, Sylar has really grown on me. I wonder how long until he resurfaces...

Several of the other characters, some of whom are kind of up in the air as far as their survival goes, I'd like to see back. Partially, because I'm not sure what their purpose was. I mean, D.L., for instance. I'd also like to see Parkman be more useful, which can only happen if he continues to breathe. Niki...feh. Micah...I think it'd be hard to find ways to use him...especially with him being a kid.

It occurs to me that in the press releases, we were promised things that I don't remember seeing. New characters for next season, for one. I guess I'll be looking for that in the morning.

I really hope they keep Tim Sale on for artwork. I was always kind of lukewarm about his art in comics, though I did like the Batman books he did with Jeph Loeb. But his work on Heroes lends it some credibility. This isn't to put down Alex Maleev, the guy responsible for Sylar's whacked out stuff. I just don't dig his style as much. Still, his version of "Nathan" as President was pretty wicked.

Was Mohinder's only real purpose to save Molly so that they could find Sylar who would've shown his face there at the plaza anyway? I mean, that and leading Sylar to the mechanic with super hearing...

I forgot to mention my favorite moment from last week, an episode that I thought was thoroughly cool upon first viewing (maybe because Greg Beeman directed it....I liked his stuff in Smallville, too) was when Bennett took out Thompson.

So very cold.

Well, I'd go on, but Aaron is sleeping on my forearm and its really hard to type this way...

Numb

2007-05-21T10:03:00.000-07:00

I think Sarah Ellerton, artist and author of Inverloch (see the links on this blog), just went for a "holy crap!" moment.

Inverloch, for those of you who don't follow it, has chronicled the adventures of a da'kor (think dog with horns) named Acheron and the group of misfits he's accumulated since embarking on his journey to find an elf, Kayndar, who was kidnapped years ago by a dark mage. I may be reading too much into it, but I think she just revealed something rather important to our understanding of what's actually been happening (and why) in the last two updates.

I'd suggest you read it. Probably all of it, since if you haven't it won't make any sense at all.

Unfortunately, tonight is the Heroes finale, so all of my Keanu-like "Whoa"s are in storage and will not be released until 8pm, central standard time.

Compliance

2007-05-18T09:18:00.000-07:00

It's Aaron! And also Spidey.

Eclipsed

2007-05-17T15:16:00.000-07:00

So, tonight is the season finale of The Office. I really like that show. It's one of the few things on TV that I purposefully watch. There are other things, of course, that I watch just because they're on, but I watch The Office because I want to watch it. It's really sad for me that the season is ending tonight.

And that's for reasons totally unrelated to The Office.

You see, I've been all about Heroes lately. It's got all my favorite things!

Super heroes...........check.
Crazy action.............check.
Conspiracy................check.
Comic books..............check.
Cinnamon-sugar pretzels from Auntie Anne's..................Well, ok, you can't have everything.

So, in all the excitement about the Heroes, I've not really been enjoying the lead-up to tonight's episode of The Office. That's not to say that I haven't enjoyed the show. It's just that...well, I'm just more excited about Heroes, which is funny, because I didn't see the first episode and just almost didn't watch any of the others because I was sure it was gonna suck. Proving, once again, that I really have no idea what I'm talking about most of the time.

Invitation

2007-05-01T15:13:00.000-07:00

If you have any interest at all in winning free Spider-Man 3 stuff, put your email address in a reply and I'll hook you up with an invite to the Spidey 3 Game Community. Lots of cool stuff. I won a shirt, a hat and some sticker.

And don't forget to check out my sketches of Peter Petrelli and Sylar below.

Heroes Sketches

2007-05-01T10:31:00.000-07:00

As promised, or at least, as suggested, here are a couple of Heroes sketches. The first is Peter, which I finished (as sketches go) last night after the show. The second is a more finished version of the Sylar sketch I could've sworn I posted back in November when I drew it, but I can't seem to find now. However, you should note how close I was to calling the death of the "super-hearing" lady. Just got the wrong gender....

By the way, the show rocked SO hard last night...

Might do some more sometime soon...(and finish the Sylar one)

Ready to Save the World

2007-04-26T15:16:00.000-07:00

Well, it's Thursday, so that means it's time for me to reiterate my love for Heroes!

What? Well, of course I know it was on Monday! Yes, I watched it then! Tuesday was no good for me, that's why! Wednesday? I had no power Wednesday!

Anyway, it was a good thing the power went out on Tuesday and not Monday just before Heroes, because I surely would've thrown a fit. A fit in the dark, but a fit nonetheless. It wasn't an episode to be missed. In an uncharacteristically helpful move, I'm going to not spoil the episode for those who've recorded it and couldn't find an hour to watch it in, yet. Still, it set the stage for a great season finale (along with the final build-up to it). I think I'll try to do some Heroes drawings and post them here. You know...right after I get some work done on that webpage for my uncle.

He only asked me to do it back in February...

No, I haven't been slacking! You know I had that logo thing to do! ...Yeah, I could've worked on it whilst waiting for word on revisions to come back... Shut up!

...Ok, here's the thing. I've forgotten whatever else I was going to say. Probably wasn't that important, but still...it's been a couple days and I wanted to fill the space talking about stuff. Stuff I don't remember, now. So...I think I'll leave.

Bye.

Oh, wait...er...nevermind.

Feh, Art...

2007-04-20T08:26:00.000-07:00

I mentioned before how I was an art major in college. Got my BA, which, as is proven by not having a job in art, is BS. The thing about art is that, while I enjoy drawing (and to a lesser degree, photography, sculpture & painting...in that order), I don't care for art.

Or, really, I don't care for artists and art lovers. I'm talking about high art, here. Popular art is more real to me. Graphic design, cartooning, that sort of thing...that's unpretentious art. The problem is (generally) people who make gallery art (and the people who fawn over them). I watched a video with Andria last night (after ER but before I turned on the end of Wednesday's Jericho episode) on John Cage, a "composer" and general flake responsible for the "musical" abomination 4'33", a piano piece which is four minutes and thirty-three seconds of whatever the crap happens to be going on in the room except the piano. The pianist approaches the piano, sits down and then, for the next four and a half minutes, keeps an eye on his watch.

This is EXACTLY why I hate art. You can do the stupidest crap and call it art and people will think you're some sort of visionary. That's just screwing around!

In short, the emperor's freaking naked!

I propose a piece of performance art. Go down to the busiest part of the town you live in or nearest to. Scream, as loud as you possibly can, "I'm Henry the Eighth, I Am!" Then, when people are gawking at you, run over and suckerpunch the nearest one. Then, when the cops come, tell them it was art.

Great News...pbbbttt!

2007-04-10T09:45:00.000-07:00

Just found out that NBC will not be airing The Black Donnelly's again. Soon or ever. Good thing, because we need more vapid shows like the waste of airtime that is Thank God You're Here.

Ok, that might've been a bit harsh. I didn't HATE the show, but other than the possibility of someone marginally famous making a fool of themself by not being funny (which is probably the funniest possible outcome), there isn't much to it more than a bunch of adults playing pretend. Wayne Knight, Seinfeld's nemesis Newman and Jurassic Park's thieving programmer Dennis Nedry, was good, but the others in the two episodes that aired were....meh. I mean, Bryan Cranston was fine until I realized that his whole bit was making out with everyone. Like Michael Scott's gun, how do you top a guy who makes out with everyone? And Mo'Nique, good grief...I totally lost respect for Dave Foley for picking her as the best in the second show...her entire comedy is based on being fat and, when that fails, black. OOOOOOH. Edie McClurg was at least able to rise above using the same crap that she rose to fame on (unless you count her appearance as a nice normal lady clashing with her behavior...but it's not like she's going to have plastic surgery just so she can escape THAT), but what the heck happened to Richard Kind and Kevin Nealon? Apparently, Nealon lost his ability to be amusing sometime after SNL, and Richard Kind...man...he failed, but in the least funny way possible. The first episode was vastly superior, and...well, that's pretty dang sad. Dave Foley, other than his award screw-up (which I suppose I could give him the benefit of the doubt and say was due to fear of Mo', since she could probably take him in a fight), was somewhat amusing in his brief parts, but more because he seemed to be laughing at himself for sinking to being a second-fiddle host on a show where the host isn't even on that much. The highlight for the whole thing had to be the audience. Not the whole audience, but the people that sat behind Dave Foley, because they didn't seem to be into it, either, which pleases me greatly. Before writing off the series entirely, I'll hang around long enough to see Angela Kinsey, who plays Angela on The Office. I don't know that she'll be any better, but she's on The Office. I watch things those people are on, such as when Rainn Wilson was on SNL.

Ugh.

Unfavorable Exchange Rate

2007-04-09T08:49:00.000-07:00

I like the Black Donnellys. I mentioned it in the last post, but I really do enjoy it. Something about the characters who are sympathetic, in spite of being ill-tempered and not terribly wholesome folk, is interesting. It's like Payback, the '99 Mel Gibson remake of Point Blank. Porter was a bad guy. Technically, not a great guy in any sense, really. However, he was the one you cheered for since he was as "in the right" as anyone in a movie filled with organized crime, crooked cops and a bunch of people deserving defenestration can be.

I love that word.

Anyway...like I mentioned before, I missed the first half of the episode and thus the last half made sense in the way that anything can make sense when you come in late. Not much. Well, unless you factor in what you know about the characters already. Then, at least, you can guess what's going on to a degree. You still miss a lot, though. As such, we were finally able to watch the first half online. Last night. Sadly, we had better connectivity on Easter than we've had the entire preceding week and a half. This is particularly sad because the NBC was dragging like a dog with worms.

If you've seen it, you know what I mean.

So, an hour long episode, minus commercials (except the 14 second ads in between 10 minute segments), which shouldn't have taken more than about 45 minutes (I suddenly realize I have no idea how much time out of a normal hour is devoted to commercials....it's like I don't even know TV anymore...). An hour and a half later, we'd watched 3 and a half segments and I decided to call it since I had a vague memory of the rest of it from last Monday.

If it's not one thing, it's another.

100, 3.5, 1/2, 3, 36

2007-04-03T09:02:00.000-07:00

100, 3.5
Well, it happened. Aaron's gotten sick for the first time. Apparently, he has an infection in both ears (how does that happen?) which has made him a little ball of unpleasantness. This is not to say that I've stopped enjoying his company. Just that it's a lot more work keeping him calm. He is, most assuredly, not enjoying himself. I'd checked his temperature before I left for work yesterday, but it wasn't until after work that he actually registered a temperature. 100 is a lot for a 3.5 month old. Of course, I worry about the accuracy of our little digital ear thermometer, but since you can't put a thermometer in a baby's mouth, I'm sure he appreciates this to the more traditional alternative.

1/2
Especially with Heroes gone...again, I've been enjoying the Black Donnelly's. However, I enjoyed it a great deal less last night. About 1/2 the enjoyment was had. This can be attributed to the fact that because of exhaustion, and going with Andria's suggestion that we turn off the tv for a bit before the show, I fell asleep about 20 minutes before it came on and missed half the show. In her defense, she actually intended to sleep. I just passed out. I plan on watching the first half online at home, but that's entirely dependent on our DSL NOT sucking, which it did most of yesterday. I get the feeling that CenturyTel was not entirely truthful when they said we could have DSL at our place.

Or they omitted the fact that we couldn't have it CONSISTENTLY.

3
I've been working on a logo for the children's ministry at my brother's church. What they've got me doing is nothing groundbreaking, but I've enjoyed it. Unfortunately, it's taxing the crap out of my laptop. It's newer than the desktop, but it really isn't appreciating the workload I'm putting on it with the file size. The thing is, I KNOW I could be doing it a different way with one of the other programs I use. I just don't know how to use that program very well and I'm not sure how to learn. Anyway, for your viewing pleasure, here are the 3 versions we've gone through thus far. Note how they're essentially the same with just slight changes. That's what's annoying. If I knew how to use that other program, it'd be 10 minutes of work. Instead, it's a week (given I have other things going on during that time as well).

36
I am, again, at the limits of my pants. As such, I will now endeavor to lose in the vicinity of 36 pounds over the next...however long it takes to get there. The time is entirely dependent on how much will power I have and how many of those wonderful, available only once a year, Cadbury Cream Eggs I ingest over the next couple weeks. I have to admit, losing that much will put me in a size smaller waist, but I can cinch up my belt. There's not a lot you can do when you've out distanced the waistband, though. Walking around with your pants open is socially frowned upon. I need to lose the weight for reasons beside that including, but not limited to:

When Aaron becomes mobile, I need to be able to keep up with him
I don't want to be an old, fat guy, and the old is coming whether I like it or not
The idea of being filmed from behind for a Dateline special on weight in America doesn't appeal to me.

The thing is, I'm not a diet and exercise guy. I can do a diet if need be, but exercise is something I don't even have time for. Unless you count carrying Aaron about, and it's getting warm enough that he doesn't really appreciate my added body warmth. I'll probably have to up the activity level a bit, but I'm not looking to be doing anything particularly spectacular. Maybe run the "Peach Festival" race in...whenever the Peach Festival is. July, perhaps. But I wouldn't count on it. I'm way more broken than I was last time I ran a race like that, and it wasn't like I was in great condition then. Mostly, I'm just afraid that I'll end up doubling the distance for all the times I have to go back and pick something up that fell off.

This All Seems So Familiar...

2007-03-29T11:00:00.000-07:00

So, I watched Star Wars last night.

I didn't think it was Star Wars when I put it in the DVD player, and I think George Lucas has gone too far with his changes now, but I recognized the story as Star Wars. It had a farm boy who was the chosen one. It had the mentor who starts said farm boy on the path, then promptly dies saving the princess. It even had a final, climactic battle where the bad guys, led by the evil wizard, attack the rebels at their base. The main difference was that all the space stuff had been taken out and replaced with dragons.

The title on the DVD said it was called Eragon and I'm guessing that Christopher Paolini is a pen name Lucas used so as to keep Star Wars purists from firebombing Skywalker Ranch.

That said, it wasn't a bad movie. I like Star Wars in its many incarnations, so there wasn't really much to dislike. Jeremy Irons was good as Obi-Brom Kenobi and the CGI dragon was convincing enough. The kid Murtagh was a poor Han Solo, and there wasn't any wookie at all, but the dragon was an acceptable trade for R2-D2 (which I guess makes the farm boy part C-3PO) even if she lacked R2's charisma.

All in all, worth Netflixing (does anyone else use Netflix as a verb?), though I'm fine with having missed it in the theater.

The Good, The Bad, and The Broken

2007-03-28T11:41:00.000-07:00

By the power of Netflix, I discovered a new love in the spaghetti western. I also discovered, make that rediscovered how easily my back can be injured.

Let's start with the pain so we can end with something good.

I've mentioned, more times than are necessary, how my house is old and not terribly well put together. Of course, I've also mentioned how I'm not terribly well put together, as well. This is more related to the latter. You see, since my house is old, we cool it with window unit A/C. It reminds me of this quote:

No pleasure, no rapture, no exquisite sin greater... than central air.

Totally true. Also, with central air, you don't have to store, unstore, lug around, and finally place huge chunks of machinery until it gets cool enough that you have to store them again. A major plus. And, as a geography note, to make sense of the how in a second, Andria and I have a "queen" sized bed in a "twin" sized room. Not to mention Aaron's bed, my dresser, her dresser, the nightstand and the dog's bed.

Yeah, yeah, the dog gets lonely in the house at night. Lonely dogs make lots of noise.

Anyway, so I'm carrying the A/C unit from the storage closet into the bedroom and everything is going as well as expected. I've managed not to destroy anything or get any storage room nastiness on our bed as I squeeze past, but the window is closed and I've got no hands left. So I start to set the unit down. I was trying to observe the "lift with the knees" rule, but with as little room as there was, I got tilted forward a little. Suddenly, the weight of the unit was now on my lower back.

It gave.

Fortunately, the unit was only about 6 inches off the ground and NOT over my toes. Still, I needed to see the chiropractor and he was out Monday. I got popped, but my back muscles are still pretty sore.

SUBJECT CHANGE!

Last week, Andria was gone on choir tour, so we set our Netflix to send all 3 of the movies from my list instead of splitting them. I got A Fistful of Dollars, A Few Dollars More, and The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

Guys, it is your duty as men to see these films. At least the first and last of them. Sure, A Fistful of Dollars was ripped off from Yojimbo, but Eastwood plays the perfect anti-hero in it. And The Good, The Bad and The Ugly was just plain goodness. Technically, it comes first, being a prequel, but the techniques used filming it shame the other two, so it's better to watch them in the order they were filmed.

I'll probably order some more of Eastwood's westerns in a while, but since the last two didn't come until after Andria was back (poor girl didn't enjoy A Few Dollars More, so I waited to watch TGTBaTU until she was in her night class...it's three hours long!) I'll give her a break first.

I'm almost convinced to try and revive that western comic I had a few pages sketched from...

Only About 4 Decades Late

2007-03-12T09:58:00.000-07:00

So, this weekend Andria and I watched Jesus Christ Superstar, the "rock opera" by Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber. This was brought on, of course, when Andria heard one of the female contestants on Grease: You're the One That I Want sing a song from it on Webber's guest judging week.

I don't remember which song it was.

Anyway, I decided, upon viewing that the name would be more properly rendered The Adventures of Pansexual "Jesus" and his Travelling Boy Band. Might as well call it like it is, right? Now, one who knows me might have expected that I would already be going into it with strikes against PJ&hTBB, given my rather conservative religious leanings, but I was aware that I probably wasn't going to be getting anything I was that familiar with. I mean, it's a friggin' Broadway musical! You want theology, go to church. You want a song a dance, you go buy a used car.

I mean, you go see a Broadway show.

Yeah.

My problems with the whole thing, putting aside what I was expecting, stem from some really odd choices with the story they told. I mean, Simon the Zealot has an entire song of his own, but Peter only gets a solo at the beginning of the reprise of "What's the Buzz"? What the heck? I mean, Peter, James and John, the big three disciples are almost entirely absent. Yet, in the "Garden" scene before Judas pops back in, "Jesus" still calls out to them specifically.

I suppose I should mention that the version I watched starred Glenn Carter as Jesus. Andria also got an older version (both through Netflix) and said that it had its own oddities. I don't understand Judas in it at all. He's supposed to be "Jesus'" right-hand man, though "Jesus" really doesn't seem to care about him (which makes sense contextually), and yet the only people Judas considers going to are Caiaphas and the temple leaders?

Really?

I find the particular line of thought "I'm irritated by the direction my best bud is taking, so I'm going to turn him over to the people most likely to kill him" a little off unless it is preceded by "A bathtub full of vodka? Drink it all? Love to!"

Of course, they never really touch on how, if "Jesus" is just a man, then he must be insane, 'cause I know if one of my coworkers started having audible conversations with "God", I'm using my sick days until after they decide to bring a gun to work. And yet, this doesn't concern Judas, who's the only one that isn't buying what "Jesus" is selling.

All these are a problem of incongruity. They felt they had to leave certain elements of the Biblical Jesus in, but they didn't consider how it was a poor fit for what they did with the rest of it. Much like "What's the Buzz" seemed out of place EVERY TIME it was sung. Like in the Garden...WAY too happy for the boy band to be waking up to Judas and the mob.

Anyway, out of the whole thing, the only shining star was the guy who played Pilate. And not because he was good, but because he looked like M. Bison.

Rocking Out

2007-02-26T13:56:00.000-08:00

This is all I have to say: Rock on, son. Rock on.

When it Rainns, it pours.

2007-02-26T13:45:00.000-08:00

I mentioned in the past that I have, basically, two shows that I really care to see. First, by scheduling, is Heroes. Every week has been another pleasant surprise, as I keep expecting the Suck Bomb to drop.

I mean, hey, it is TV.

Anyway, the other show, which I've also mentioned, is The Office. Sure, it took me a couple episodes to get into it (those episodes are now much more funny now that I actually enjoy the show...odd), but now I really look forward to the new episodes. That's why I was interested when I heard that Rainn Wilson, Dwight, was hosting Saturday Night Live. He's been pretty good in everything else I've seen, Sahara, for one, but SNL has, how you might say, SUCKED in recent years, so I was a bit aprehensive, too.

Apparently, that was the old Spidey-sense tingling. Man, was it awful. Apparently, SNL doesn't have an equivalent of the "Friday Night Massacre" on Studio 60. Either that, or the idea that there was worse stuff that didn't make it on scares me.

Man, that show sucks.

Grease'd

2007-02-19T11:07:00.000-08:00

I've made mention of the fact, in times past, that I don't much care for reality tv. I've rehashed it a couple times and I don't feel like it again. Suffice to say, they aren't, generally, good. My wife, on the other hand, rather enjoys them. Specifically the music related ones, American Idol (though we've only watched a season and a half since we've been together) and Rockstar (which I actually enjoyed) spring to mind. This trend has been carried on with Grease: You're the One That I Want!, which I don't exactly hate, but that's more due to a general erosion of my willingness to fight over these things. I do have my favorite "Danny" and "Sandy"s, but it won't break my heart to see them go. Actually, I think it'd be funny if the show that they're casting for tanked. That would bring a great deal of joy to my blackened heart.

The thing that bothers me most about Grease... is that the songs stick in my head. I mean, it was bad enough when we'd watch the Travolta/Newton-John version, but now they get refreshed every week. It's akin to lighting yourself on fire and, when the flames begin to die down, you have a friend pour some more gasoline on you.

A perpetual Richard Pryor, if you will.

You'd get that reference if you were older.

Kids...feh.

Bow to your corporate masters!

2007-02-16T15:05:00.000-08:00

I know this is probably unethical on some level, but I'm really psyched about the new Spider-Man movie. The above banner is actually for the tie-in game, which will hopefully rock as hard as Ultimate Spider-Man, but I suppose we'll have to wait and see. It's been proven, though, that a good Spidey game CAN be made, so here's to hoping!

Toothless

2007-02-16T13:04:00.000-08:00

I've made it no secret that, generally, I'm politically conservative. Actually, I'm more politically apathetic, given that I don't feel like the system in any way represents me or any of the other "little people" (the populace at large, not limited to, well, little people), but when I vote, I tend to vote conservatively. Generally, this means that I end up voting for guys who I know will be self-serving idiots just because they claim they'll vote the way I want them to on what are key issues for me as a voter. I know, when I vote for them, that they're probably going to do a lot of other things that will end up screwing me over, but so long as those key issues are covered, I'll just have to suck it up and take it like a man.

That said, I've never supported the war in Iraq. I think, looking back, that we did some good there, early on, but lately all we seem to be doing is swapping lives for no real gain. So I can see where the Democratic party leaders in Congress might see an opportunity to exercise their power to do something about it. Personally, I think that we made this mess, we need to clean it up, but I'm aware that I'm just a guy who hears stuff on the news. It's possible that they could have better information than I do.

That's why I've lost any possibility of having respect for all of them. Well, ok, I didn't really have much respect for the people in Congress (or most politicians, really), so this is more like going into negative numbers, but, come on! A non-binding resolution?!?!? If you're going to do something, have the guts to do it all the way! It's like the little guy who wants to make a show like he's a threat, but makes sure his friends are "holding him back" so he doesn't actually have to get in a fight. Are there political implications of this little weenie bill? Sure. Everybody will be on record (except for the ones who can't be bothered to show up) as to where they stand on the war, but that's just a bunch of posturing for the ones running for President who don't want to be held accountable for their original votes for the war. I really think Hillary is the worst thus far. I've had no love for her before, but she keeps saying that if she'd had better information, then she would've voted differently.

As if she had no responsibility to research for herself before voting.

The thing is, like everyone else who voted for the war, she got caught up in the post 9-11 feelings and, maybe even motivated by her constituency (I imagine the people of New York might've had a problem with her if she'd voted against it, since they were such a big part of the whole thing), and she voted with her feelings instead of researching it for herself and voting that way.

Then again, maybe I'm giving her too much credit. Maybe she is just voting with whatever she thinks will be more popular.

The problem with democracy is that it ignores the fact that people, as a collective, are stupid. The problem with representative democracy is that it panders to the collectively stupid.

Dubious Holidays

2007-02-14T13:44:00.000-08:00

I like Valentines Day. That hasn't always been the case but, as I am married and, thus, guaranteed to have a Valentine of my very own to love and hug and squeeze and call her name George (Andria probably wouldn't appreciate it if I did call her George, though), it's alright in my book. Still, I find the whole thing a bit...unsettling. I mean, isn't there a better way to celebrate the spirit of undying love than by tagging it to a guy who was (by tradition) beheaded?

If not, maybe we're marketing it wrong. How about instead of giving heart-shaped boxes full of chocolate to our loved ones, we pass out little chocolate saint statues?

No heads, of course.

And perhaps, instead of cards, we could tell the parents of our significant others that they remind us of fishmongers, in honor of Ophelia, who went swimming without a lifeguard and didn't make it to Valentines Day.

And Cupid, he's out. Instead, those who want to send a message of love can employ men dressed as mobsters and cops, the way Capone sent a message to "Bugs" Moran and his men.

Besides, all the grown men wandering around in diapers kinda creeps me out.

Still, we've gotta keep the chocolate. Without it, there'd only be Easter between New Years and people fitting into their swimsuits in the summer and, really, how many Cadbury eggs can one person be expected to eat?

Anxiety...ATTACK!

2007-02-02T15:30:00.000-08:00

I've been having a bit of anxiety where the site is concerned. Obviously, my level of involvement here over the last year has been less than...much. I've had numerous false starts on comics and I've even planned a redesign on the site that didn't happen. That last one is partially my fault and partially the fault of the people who make the irrational policies on our email at work. It's ok to keep a viewed email forever (so long as you don't exceed your inbox capacity), but unread emails have a shelf-life of 30 days, no more. The sketched version disappeared (I emailed it to myself so I could work on it at home), so I have nothing to go off of and I don't have any ideas for what to do with it.

Then there's the new comic idea...which is an older comic idea that's jumped back to the front. I have it more fleshed out than I did in the past, which is good...helps make comicking easier. Unfortunately, every time I start to draw, I...well, I don't. It has been suggested that my passion for drawing has been replaced by my passion for fatherhood, which in and of itself is not a bad thing (I do want to be a good dad), but since drawing was my outlet for frustration and creative impulse...well, not having that may end up being difficult on me later. I don't know how this works.

And there you have it. I'm freaking out because I'm not drawing, but I'm not drawing because, other than in the theoretical sense, I don't care to. I mean, even in times when Aaron isn't around and I might normally draw, I don't. What's THAT all about? Hopefully, this will resolve itself. I'll discover that mostly my inability to make myself draw was a byproduct of sleep-deprivation or something. But if it doesn't, that may mean fatherhood has changed me to an extent I wasn't prepared for, and that scares me.

Who am I, now?

The Geek vs. The Tight-wad

2007-01-29T10:06:00.000-08:00

As I grow older and more encumbered with responsibility (wife, first, then child), I am becoming increasingly paranoid about the state of my finances. It's not like I'm more broke now than I was before. I've got at least the second highest paying job I've held in my life and the least amount of bills (it helps living in a house owned by family that doesn't charge you rent). Still, I get in a panic often about whether or not we have enough cash reserves to handle whatever major purchase may be lurking beyond sight, it's dagger-like claws set to rend the soft leathered flesh of my wallet. You know, car troubles and that sort. However, it is also note-worthy that I am a huge geek. There have been times when walking through the mall, I'll swing by the toy store, for no real purpose than to occupy time, and see something like a giant Lego set for building a large TIE Fighter or the Death Star or the Super Star Destroyer Executor, and I'll think to myself, "...muuuuuuust...haaaaaaaaaave..." much like the undead yearn for the brains of the living. The thing is, dropping $80 or more on a Lego set when I haven't played with Legos in over a decade and a half seems a bit...unnecessary. My resistance for smaller purchases, though, is considerably less. Conceivably, I could nickel and dime myself to death far quicker than I could ever fall prey to some larger purchase of geeky-goodness.

This is where Andria comes in. She's supposed to be the voice of reason for me. When she's feeling the urge to go overboard, then it's my job. Usually she's pretty good at it. I mean, I didn't get the theater release versions of Star Wars on DVD until Christmas!!!

Anyway, last night, we were at Wal-Mart. We'd been out for a while already and it was high time we headed home, since we were out of formula in the diaper bag and Aaron was expressing a growing concern about where his next meal was coming from. Still, Andria was making a final selection on some purchase or other, and I'd already grabbed her movie that we'd come in to pick up (as a show of how much more I love her than my sanity, I bought her Grease on DVD for Christmas...unfortunately, the copy I'd gotten had a bad spot on it and some of the features didn't work...so we returned it and got this new copy), so I swung by the toy department to see if they'd gotten any other Star Wars Galactic Heroes toys that Aaron couldn't live without. They did not.

HOWEVER....they did have the entire run of Marvel Superhero Squad toys. Hoo boy. They seem to lack just a wee bit of the coolness of the Star Wars toys, but, well, that didn't stop me from being excited. I brought Andria over and showed her.

Then a strange thing happened. We walked out with half of the entire set.

There's only one X-Men duo and one Avengers duo that we didn't get (and also the Daredevil/Electra and Punisher/Ghost Rider sets). This leads me to ask one question.

WHAT HAPPENED? Where was the voice of reason? I figured we'd maybe buy two packs, not even three, but most likely only one! With Andria there, I wasn't prepared to let the tight-wad side put up resistance, so there wasn't any at all!

Oh well. The geeking of my son continues. [Insert Maniacal Super-villain Laughter}

Wedded Bliss and The Death of Scheduling

2007-01-29T08:36:00.000-08:00

It would appear that "being married" has kept Cricket from "making comics". My guess is that she's got him knitting doilies and dusting the place, as he is the "woman" of the relationship.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to bury this underneath another post so that I can mock him in secret.

Withdrawal

2007-01-25T13:13:00.000-08:00

Ok. It's been nearly a week that I've been back at work now. Also, today, Andria finishes up her second week of classes. I think that, between the two of us, I am handling the separation from Aaron better. I mean, she's rearranged her classes so that she only has one day of stuff that causes her to be gone away from him when I'm not home.

Alright. Who am I kidding? I just don't have the options she does. Its not like I can somehow compress my work week into less days. Even if I stopped taking lunches, that'd only get me half a day more time at home. And it blows!

I still enjoy my job, don't get me wrong, but I've come to the realization that I now (more than ever) only have the patience for people who act like babies when they ARE ACTUALLY BABIES. But, aside from a certain coworker, everyone has been absolutely cool.

Just not as cool as Aaron.

You may note that the tags for this post are "Baby" and "Life". The two are really becoming indistinguishable, lately.

I Wanna Be A Rockstar...

2007-01-23T08:16:00.000-08:00

My little alarm clock. Generally, from what I hear, new babies aren't supposed to sleep through the night. Back when I was on leave, 5am was dang near close enough, but now that I'm working again, it's entirely too close to when I'm getting up anyway. So, you can imagine that it's not with the greatest of enthusiasm that I get up when Aaron decides that he's hungry between 4 and 5. I've organized my sleep schedule so that, if all goes well, I'll be in bed by 11pm (which is like old people early, but its what I was doing before he came anyway) and awake at 6am (about 45 minutes earlier than usual to allow time for feeding AND showering...my coworkers appreciate the effort, I think). Well, I haven't made it to bed before midnight, yet, because his end of the day feeding keeps running long, and the time in between has yet to be interruption-free, but it's hard to be mad at him, 'cause he's so cute.

Also, anger is more effort than I can muster that early in the morning.

It is a sad thing, though, that I have returned to work. I still like my job, that's not the issue. I miss my time with Aaron (the time after 9:30 am) when we watched tv together.

It will also drive me crazy for a week or so that all the soaps that I got into will be continuing without me as a viewer.

What? It's not like there's anything else on until the late afternoon on the three channels I get.

Just a Little Guy...

2006-12-20T23:15:00.000-08:00

Ok, so here's the news. John Aaron Tobias Askins was born on December 13th. He weighed in at 8 lbs. 9 oz. and measured at 21 inches. He's easily the most perfect baby ever. He's almost always calm (except when he's hungry) and he's got the coolest hair. I've been late on posting because...well, hanging out with the boy has been a little higher on the priority list. But, as a proud father, I couldn't wait any longer.

So, making his Dim Bulb debut....it's Aaron!

1 AM

2006-12-12T01:03:00.000-08:00

It is now an hour into Tuesday and Aaron is not yet here. We'll be going to the hospital tonight to get things going. In the meantime, however, I think I'll be getting some sleep...

This Just In: Fred Gallagher is a Girl!

2006-12-07T08:25:00.000-08:00

Search your feelings. You know it to be true.

So, after all this time, I've decided I'm ok with it. Aaron can stay in there. I rather like the way things are and having a baby around would change everything.

The problem with blogging reverse psychology about unborn children is that they don't usually get a reliable internet connection in the womb.

On a more serious note, I'm sure everyone and their dog out there is saying something about it (I know the news is), but I hope that if it comes to it, I can be the kind of dad James Kim went out being. I don't know how he lived, but I know how he died and if I were in a similar place, I want to die for my family. I'm sure he didn't plan for that to happen, it surely seems he didn't, but you've got to respect a guy who will risk death to save the ones they love. I'm sure his last hours were at least scary and it was probably more than unpleasant, but he manned up and did what needed to be done. There's no shame in that.

T-plus 1 day and blah blah blah

2006-12-06T10:26:00.000-08:00

So.....very.......cold....

Yeah, so...no baby, yet. Also, no baby yeti. I'm glad about the second one. He weighed in at an estimated 8.5 lbs (that's 3.86 kg for you metric folk) on Monday. If he goes until next Wednesday, he could be well over 9.

DUDE.

While I'm really excited about the birth (couldn't you tell?), I feel bad about all the crap my wife has gone through to get to this point. Her acid reflux has gone crazy (which it would've been bad for any other pregnant woman, anyway) because she can't take her medicine (they haven't done enough tests to show it is safe for pregnant women). Her back is a mess and she can't go to the chiropractor or take more than a couple tylenol (one at a time) through the day (the equivalent of trying destroying a car with a feather). This is to say nothing of the fact that he never actually got out of her ribs. He's been quite content to grow downwards instead of going that direction. All in all, being pregnant sounds like a whole lot of suck. I guess the end justifies the means, but...still!

On a different subject, I hate Tuesday nights. There is SO much nothing on tv. I suppose the fact that I only get 3 channels has something to do with it (unless you count PBS...and why would you?).

I'm feeling snacky and nauseous at the same time today. I skipped breakfast this morning because I wasn't feeling too great, but apparently my brain (kind of) won, because I'm now eating stale cheese cracker sandwiches (you know....the ones that come with the crappy peanut butter filling?). They are...acceptable.

T-minus 0 days and still counting

2006-12-05T08:34:00.000-08:00

Today is the big day. Not that you'd know it around our house, but according to the calendar, Aaron will be officially late as of midnight tonight. Way to go, boy. You missed your birthday.

All kidding aside, though, it is a real letdown that not only did he not come early (it's been acceptable for him to come since the middle of last month, development-wise) but he also isn't going to be on time. Moreso for Andria than I, but I'm ready for him to be ready already. The doctor said we're looking at next Wednesday as the big action day if he doesn't come on his own by then. And I was so looking forward to having him here this weekend. We could watch cartoons together.

Or Star Wars. First chance I get, A New Hope is going in the DVD player and I'll start introducing him to the finer things in life.

I tried to get a little drawing done last night. I drew four boxes and a three dimensional cylinder. Whoo. The problem is, between nerves (baby-related...I despise waiting...I'm so impatient), Heroes (last night's episode was SO good), and walking through Wal-Mart late last night (anything to "encourage" Aaron to be born already is cool with me), there was hardly any chance I was going to get settled enough to draw. I've been working on a drawing of Sylar (Heroes, again) since last Monday, and I'm just barely any further than I was at this time last week. It's looking rather nice, I think, but I'd like to be done, you know?

I'm really hoping Aaron will come soon. I'm officially off my groove until further notice.

T-minus 1 day and counting...

2006-12-04T10:22:00.000-08:00

First of all...

Hee hee! I'm quite excited that we found this. Now, it's only three years until he'll be old enough to play with it.

So, anyway, tomorrow's the due date. I'm getting anxious. It's not nerves, exactly. I'm just really over the waiting and there is always a sense of uncertainty when you start something new. Especially when it involves someone who'll change your life forever. I mean, at this point, Aaron has no idea that I'm an idiot. I figure I'll be able to hide that fact from him for 8, maybe 9 or 10 years, but then...ugh. Hopefully, I'll wise up enough in the meantime that I can stay ahead of that notion until adolescence, when I don't have a chance anyway.

The funny thing about all this stuff is that I'm vacillating between calm and nervous calm. The only main difference is an elusive feeling of tension (along the lines of what Obi-Wan mentioned at the start of Phantom Menace). That nervous feeling makes me more nervous than the actual reason I'm getting the feeling in the first place. I mean...is my subconscious trying to tell me I've forgotten to take care of something???

Either way, tomorrow just my be my boy's birthday. Those only come around once in a lifetime. Usually, the celebration of such is far less frantic and not nearly so traumatic for those involved (though I'm sure the doctors wish they could get the money on said celebration days that they get for the main event). Still, I'm really excited and I can't wait to turn him into a Star Wars fan.

'Cause it's not like I'm going to be able to help him turn into an athlete.

Little bits to chew on

2006-11-28T10:43:00.000-08:00

1) I watch the Today Show in the mornings while I'm getting ready. Of course, for the last several months, if I've had any free time between when I'm supposed to leave and when I finish getting prepped for work, I've been playing a little Midnight Club 3, which I finally finished (yeah, I know...but you try beating a game in a reasonable amount of time while only playing it 10 minutes at a whack). So, more Today Show for me. My main motivation is that the cast irritates me less than the other morning shows and I do need to have SOME idea of what is going on in the world. Unfortunately, this also means I get a lot of the Hollywood gossip crap that they don't put on the real news shows in the evenings.

For instance, I learned that Britney Spears and Paris Hilton have been hanging out. If that isn't call for a catastrophic club fire, I don't know what is. Anyway, they also have been hanging out with Lindsay Lohan. You know what I realized? Well, first, I realized that people who can't sing seem to be clumping together like stroke-causing platelets on a cholesterol build-up, but THEN I realized that...we're all stuck in Junior High! Why does anyone care who these people hang out with? Why does anyone care what they do? And why doesn't anyone who cares happen to have a sniper rifle and an overdeveloped sense of cultural justice?

Ahem...anyway, think about it. We've got the party girls, the cool guys (you know, the Brad Pitts and George Clooneys...any of the guys who've at some point been named as Sexiest Man Alive or somesuch nonsense), the jocks (T.O., LeBron, etc.), and we've even got the bullies. Of course, you'll almost never have to worry about them flushing your head in the toilet or stealing your milk money. It's your retirement they're after. It's like we're all living on Dawson's Creek.

What? That show's not on anymore? What do I know? I only get three channels.

2) I love me some Heroes. That show is basically my reason for getting up on Mondays. Yes, I realize that it doesn't come on until 8pm Central, but if I don't go to work, I can't get paid. If I can't get paid, I can't give the electric company their money. If they don't get their money, they shut off my power and I can't watch Heroes on Monday nights. And that would be a shame. I mean, I could easily get as involved in it as some people do Lost, had I the time. It wouldn't hurt my feelings any to go over the episodes frame by frame looking at different bits of stuff like looking for the RNA symbol or where else the double slash mark has turned up or even trying to find things in previous episodes after they've come to light, but...I don't have that kind of time, so I just wait for the next airing.

For those of you wondering why my wife isn't my reason for getting out of the bed...dude, she doesn't have to get up until after I've left. She's another reason to stay IN bed.

3) The lamp they have in the delivery rooms at our hospital totally look like some sort of death ray. Especially the way they open out of the ceiling. I keep checking to make sure that our baby isn't going to be delivered by Dr. No.

"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mrs. Askins, I expect you to push!"

Appendage

2006-11-20T10:19:00.000-08:00

I think my appendix is the only thing working properly anymore. Went to the optometrist on Friday (having my eyes dilated was an interesting experience) and got a prescription for glasses to use while on the computer (stupid eyestrain). I can't sleep at night because my neck is out of whack, which isn't that painful, but it causes my shoulder to hurt in the way things should only hurt when they're being ripped off. My knees seem to be failing me. I've done nothing to them, but going downstairs requires having a hand on the rail because if I stumble, they aren't strong enough to catch me anymore. Also, standing is less than pleasant. And, to top it off, my stomach seems to have missed that minor detail concerning where it ends and my esophagus begins, since it apparently believes that its acid is just fine so long as it hasn't gone over the edge into my trachea. Of course, a little spillage is bound to happen when it's up that high.

As you can see, the only thing that hasn't failed me yet is my appendix, and it doesn't even do anything (except eventually blow up and try to kill you).

So, if you happen to have a spare body lying around, preferably unused, I'd really appreciate it if you could send it to me for Christmas. This one's pretty much ready to be traded in.

Loss

2006-11-14T08:30:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, my grandfather passed away. That was pretty tough for a number of reasons, most of which you can probably guess. I wish I'd been able to be there and it's tough knowing that I can't be there for the funeral, either. Still, I have a lot of good memories of him and I feel a great deal more peace about everything than I expected. I'll miss my Grandpa Ray, and I'm sorry he didn't get to meet Aaron, but I'll still carry him with me.